𝔪𝔶𝔰𝔭𝔞𝔠𝔢 𝔯𝔬𝔡𝔢𝔬 𝔮𝔲𝔢𝔢𝔫

(just another pretty girl in a picture)

[𝔪𝔶𝔰𝔭𝔞𝔠𝔢 𝔯𝔬𝔡𝔢𝔬 𝔮𝔲𝔢𝔢𝔫 @skimaskbruja]

crying is the most fun a girl can have without taking her clothes off

[𝔪𝔶𝔰𝔭𝔞𝔠𝔢 𝔯𝔬𝔡𝔢𝔬 𝔮𝔲𝔢𝔢𝔫 @skimaskbruja]

@NashSevereWx 4 inches in Donelson, still snowing

[𝔪𝔶𝔰𝔭𝔞𝔠𝔢 𝔯𝔬𝔡𝔢𝔬 𝔮𝔲𝔢𝔢𝔫 @skimaskbruja]

I just re-read all my tweets from the last 3 years and, honestly, I am hilarious. Why did I go to threads. They don’t know me there.

[Astro Poets @poetastrologers]

1st date

Aries: I’ll order for us
Taurus: Don’t you dare!

[𝔪𝔶𝔰𝔭𝔞𝔠𝔢 𝔯𝔬𝔡𝔢𝔬 𝔮𝔲𝔢𝔢𝔫 @skimaskbruja]

I don’t leave 3 star reviews.

[✧ @northstardoll]

how it feels having a job

[𝔪𝔶𝔰𝔭𝔞𝔠𝔢 𝔯𝔬𝔡𝔢𝔬 𝔮𝔲𝔢𝔢𝔫 @skimaskbruja]

driving around with my sisters ashes in my lap listening to p!nk

[𝔪𝔶𝔰𝔭𝔞𝔠𝔢 𝔯𝔬𝔡𝔢𝔬 𝔮𝔲𝔢𝔢𝔫 @skimaskbruja]

it’s me, the girl digging in the lettuce section looking at expiration dates.

[𝔪𝔶𝔰𝔭𝔞𝔠𝔢 𝔯𝔬𝔡𝔢𝔬 𝔮𝔲𝔢𝔢𝔫 @skimaskbruja]

If you don’t combine sleeping pills with wine on international long-haul flights, you are not a professional.

[𝔪𝔶𝔰𝔭𝔞𝔠𝔢 𝔯𝔬𝔡𝔢𝔬 𝔮𝔲𝔢𝔢𝔫 @skimaskbruja]

Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom 😖

[𝔪𝔶𝔰𝔭𝔞𝔠𝔢 𝔯𝔬𝔡𝔢𝔬 𝔮𝔲𝔢𝔢𝔫 @skimaskbruja]

I’ve never been more ready to judge people wearing more money than I’ll ever have #MetGala

[𝔪𝔶𝔰𝔭𝔞𝔠𝔢 𝔯𝔬𝔡𝔢𝔬 𝔮𝔲𝔢𝔢𝔫 @skimaskbruja]

am I pregnant or did I eat too many pickled jalapeños? stay tuned.

[𝔪𝔶𝔰𝔭𝔞𝔠𝔢 𝔯𝔬𝔡𝔢𝔬 𝔮𝔲𝔢𝔢𝔫 @skimaskbruja]

@raynefq It’s me

[𝔪𝔶𝔰𝔭𝔞𝔠𝔢 𝔯𝔬𝔡𝔢𝔬 𝔮𝔲𝔢𝔢𝔫 @skimaskbruja]

the first “nice tats” of the szn 😩

[𝔪𝔶𝔰𝔭𝔞𝔠𝔢 𝔯𝔬𝔡𝔢𝔬 𝔮𝔲𝔢𝔢𝔫 @skimaskbruja]

Sylvia Plath knew exactly what she was talking about when she wrote “I kissed a girl and I liked it, the taste of her cherry chapstick.”

[𝔪𝔶𝔰𝔭𝔞𝔠𝔢 𝔯𝔬𝔡𝔢𝔬 𝔮𝔲𝔢𝔢𝔫 @skimaskbruja]

only gwyneth paltrow could manage to be severely unpopular and then severely popular in the same week

[𝔪𝔶𝔰𝔭𝔞𝔠𝔢 𝔯𝔬𝔡𝔢𝔬 𝔮𝔲𝔢𝔢𝔫 @skimaskbruja]

Not my parents pulling up to the car wash bumping Aquarius by The 5th Dimension

[𝔪𝔶𝔰𝔭𝔞𝔠𝔢 𝔯𝔬𝔡𝔢𝔬 𝔮𝔲𝔢𝔢𝔫 @skimaskbruja]

It’s hard to trust gen z cause as far as I can see they don’t go through a goth, punk, or emo phase. Their whole life is just a tik tok montage.

[𝔪𝔶𝔰𝔭𝔞𝔠𝔢 𝔯𝔬𝔡𝔢𝔬 𝔮𝔲𝔢𝔢𝔫 @skimaskbruja]

The trick to the cold weather Irish goodbye is committing to the jacket. You can’t ever take it off.

[𝔪𝔶𝔰𝔭𝔞𝔠𝔢 𝔯𝔬𝔡𝔢𝔬 𝔮𝔲𝔢𝔢𝔫 @skimaskbruja]

The girl that hid sex from her parents in her teens would be flabbergasted by what happens between you, your parents, your in laws, and just about everyone in your family + medical/religious/scientific official and Google when you are in your 30s and start trying to have a baby.