slasher | shedtwt

#shedtwt ~ uncensored/censored ~ @undeadrai 🖤

[slasher | shedtwt @slasher_xo]

— Slasher . . — 🔪
「it/its . 19 . pan」
🩸 ︵ shedtwt

No dni ~ ibf
I follow back, moots? 🤭
Note i am in active recovery, i no longer sh/post sh but am still active here 😋

[slasher | shedtwt @slasher_xo]

Maybe he deleted his account, i remember him considering it ages ago. I hope he’s out there somewhere still.

[slasher | shedtwt @slasher_xo]

i hate randomly losing moots, i used to have one on here and i’ve been trying to find him for MONTHS but it’s like his account has completely disappeared. i just wanted to see if he’s still alive but i can’t find him anywhere.

[slasher | shedtwt @slasher_xo]

What if I cant get past a certain point? What if I'm stuck like this forever? What if im constantly never going to be enough for them in that way? I hate trauma, I hate the person who made me like this. I'm nearly 19 i should be able to do the simplest shit for them by now.

[slasher | shedtwt @slasher_xo]

i hate how bad the urges are, i feel so guilty about it. I shouldn't have urges when im around them, im meant to be happy. I am happy, just idk. All I want is to give in.

[slasher | shedtwt @slasher_xo]

@icyburrow_ something to do with why schools should be more accessible for disabled people (including myself) it was 4 years ago now but im pretty sure I got a merit? (second to best score)

[slasher | shedtwt @slasher_xo]

I honestly dont know how much longer I can stay clean, everything is catching up to me now. They're both dying, I knew it was going to happen soon but now? Relapsing would help clear my head alot rn.

[slasher | shedtwt @slasher_xo]

just once wouldnt hurt, right?

[slasher | shedtwt @slasher_xo]

what if I kms.
(i wont, im being very dramatic.)

[slasher | shedtwt @slasher_xo]

"its not fair why can he do it but I can't." stfu this is so fucking stupid. I shouldn't be jealous and angry and borderline splitting over something so small. All I wanna do is find whatever I can and wienwiejenej. Okay getting over it, this isnt fair on anyone.

[slasher | shedtwt @slasher_xo]

I need to get out of my head omd. This is so fucking stupid.

[slasher | shedtwt @slasher_xo]

bashes my head against the wall actually.

[slasher | shedtwt @slasher_xo]

what if I can never do the things I want to do because I'm so conscious that im in the 'wrong' body. I don't know why I'm like this.

[slasher | shedtwt @slasher_xo]

mmmm i can't do this again I can't I can't. -s

[slasher | shedtwt @slasher_xo]

i hate being like this. i hate being stuck in this body. I wish I was my own person. I wanted time like normal to wind down from it but others took over and im still stuck like it just happened. I hate this. -sl

[slasher | shedtwt @slasher_xo]

really wanna relapse. I can't handle this shit.

[slasher | shedtwt @slasher_xo]

i just wanna relapse but I cant because then its my fault if something else happens but the pressure to not do it is so much. I just want to make everything okay again, I just want to cut..