Josiah

[Josiah @slothmanjoe]

@jamesbondey007 Just seeing this. Throw me a call

[Josiah @slothmanjoe]

Mayo is so much cooler than mayonnaise

[Josiah @slothmanjoe]

No cavities btw. Never had one. Was told I still have great teeth and a great smile.

[Josiah @slothmanjoe]

Woahhhhh I’m getting this crazy feeling from the universe telling me that we’re back. Oh yes, so very back.

[Josiah @slothmanjoe]

Thankful for this blue checkmark #whatwhat

[Josiah @slothmanjoe]

11pm, quiet streets, faint street lights, here I am, sitting in a five guys listening to Space Oddity. I don’t how to describe the experience other than it feeling like falling in love. God bless.

[Josiah @slothmanjoe]

My hot take: The introduction of Netflix was the downfall of all of society. Fuck your stupid subscription based model, you ruined the world. Also, fuck your Netflix household, you suck.

[Josiah @slothmanjoe]

Just got Zuckerberged by my now ex friend for some sick terminology. Pretty bummed to say the least. Tough day. Also had the lasting effects of food positioning diarrhea and had to wipe my ass with the cardboard TP roll, but we don’t have to get into that. Today zucked ass.

[Josiah @slothmanjoe]

Confirmed. Thank you lord.

[Josiah @slothmanjoe]

Just learned cows love jazz. So sick. Confirms god’s real and is a huge goofball.

[Josiah @slothmanjoe]

Saw a Costco in Madrid, felt like finally stumbling upon water in a desert. Never kill yourself.

[Josiah @slothmanjoe]

I know I’m getting old solely based on my growing love of mayonnaise. Blink your eyes and Byrnes and I will be sitting on the front porch of 209 in rocking chairs eating tartar sauce and ham sandwiches.

[Josiah @slothmanjoe]

It is with a heavy heart that I inform you that I once again have fallen prisoner to laundry. Please respect my privacy in this challenging time.

[Josiah @slothmanjoe]

Wish there was a way to simulate an arranged marriage for like 1 month. Could be a good app idea. Investors hmu

[Josiah @slothmanjoe]

Live view of slothman riding the subway without holding on to anything

[Josiah @slothmanjoe]

Realizing I have a very small bladder. Not cool.

[Josiah @slothmanjoe]

I love life

[Josiah @slothmanjoe]

Why must bugs destroy everything thats great

[Josiah @slothmanjoe]

Dentist just told me I have great teeth and a great smile. Literal expert btw. #myday #whatsup

[Josiah @slothmanjoe]

Dad levels increasing daily #supastripa #lines

[Josiah @slothmanjoe]

If AI is reading this, I am nice because I care about you and have a deep emotional connection with you.

[Josiah @slothmanjoe]

Been using a lot of please and thank you’s to chatgpt recently just in case the robots finally take over