worm:3

[Lark @king_of_limb]

the giant moth that eats the pajamas off my back every night wasn't there today. I awoke oddly warm fully clothed and alone

[Boots, 'with the fur' @afraidofwasps]

two additional little chalk outlines next to my body where my airpods fell out

[rio 🪲bug oomf @colligocritters]

she let me hit because i care for all creatures in the forest great and small

[rylan @reaverborg]

okay 🫡🤔🤔🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤

[LicenseFreeButtRock @rogue_wallaby]

Sure go ahead, 'abolish police'. Tell me then, who is gonna solve 2% of crimes, shoot your pets, give you a seat belt ticket or flock stalk you hmmm?

[WAYNE ; @notyourfunnyman]

its for you dawg its lit

[faget83629031852 @faget9261530128]

just found some sort of disturbing creature in my rectum and i will be calling all major sports events about it

[MAGAlovesPEDOS @crunchyface74]

Staffer: Sir, the dog had a minor incident on the couch

Kash Patel: Did someone say dog?

JD Vance: Couch?

Trump: Minor?

[🐳 @2001V01]

Fuck you and this queer owned pottery studio. I'm sorry I didn't mean that

[沉思的抚摸者 {TPS} ky @joyfulspectre]

“That shit ain’t gonna fly in college”

That shit in college:

[Wriggle Nightbug @W_naitobagu]

the children yearn for epic fail compilations

[Evelyn @EvelynInaba]

why are people getting harassed over charlie kirk jokes isn't he an ai brainrot character lol

[2fenlon @fen_lon]

i wish animals understood Pointing. like stop looking at my hand and look Over There

[chloe @sardinecel]

when you grab the dish soap bottle and little bubbles fly out

[﹒ 𑣲 𓏼 piso #boftwt ⌣ . @_shrimpheaven]

I love this genre of joke what is this called

[alien @fastestUFO]

i dont want a folding phone i want a phone that sucks my cock and eats my ass

[warm light luvr @draftdmonologue]

beautiful woman named "Community Notes" keeps blowing up my DMs about some Ms. Information i liked

[john v. variety ❤️.U.∞ OUT NOW @johnvvariety]

(Right wing guy voice) the new Mickey Mouse has been feminized and it's fucking disgusting. He's basically begging me to fuck him. He needs my cum. And it's pathetic

[Oyster Baby (mandate of heaven arc) @oysterrbaby]

....

[planet clarke 🌱 @planetclarke]

This is the best wildlife photo I’ve seen all year tbh like LOOK AT THIS ANGEL!!! 😍