slystef❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🩷🩵🩶🤎

Wish life weren’t stupid af —old tweets

[slystef❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🩷🩵🩶🤎 @slytherinstef]

Trying to migrate to where the skies are blue 💙

Like my votes

slystef7 if you’re in the area

[Evan Lazarus @elazie_]

Went on a date… Were the date never showed up. So I pretended to never have left the bar.

[a blast from the past @a_past24460]

Morning!

[𝙻𝙰𝙸𝙻𝙰 @LailaPalestini1]

Raise your hand ✋ if you AGREE

[ᗰᗩƳᖇᗩ @LePapillonBlu2]

I hope this helps, guys. 😆

[Jessey Electric Slut Ukulele Sterling @JesterWuzHere]

I just want a French bulldog and a husband with a Scottish accent!!!

Is that too fucking much to ask!?!

[mariana Z @mariana057]

The giant spider in my room is now named Cotton Eyed Joe, because I want to know two things:

-where did he come from

-where did he go

[slystef❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🩷🩵🩶🤎 @slytherinstef]

Me- for the foreseeable future:

[Fuckin’ Princess @8WithaTiara]

Everybody talking about how poor people shouldn’t be able to buy junk food on food stamps..

Well, I don’t think billionaires oughta be able to buy 14-year-olds on private islands..

But here we are

[slystef❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🩷🩵🩶🤎 @slytherinstef]

Where does drinking wine and eating Peep and Reese’s pumpkin “sandwiches” before crying myself to sleep fall on the self care scale??
Asking for a friend

[Ok Kate @Kateness8]

Come to the ocean with me, I’m very classy

[Charlie @mosscj2]

If your life actually does flash in front of your eyes just before you die, and if each iteration includes the life flashing at the end, you are probabilistically more likely to be in the middle of a perpetual series of life flashings than you are to be living your actual life.

[Ok Kate @Kateness8]

I had a salad for lunch and then 16 handfuls of Cheetos for lunch dessert

[San Antonio Zoo 🦍 @SanAntonioZoo]

This is Waffles. She’s very polite.

[BrooklynDad_Defiant!☮️ @mmpadellan]

I don't know who needs to hear this, but Puerto Ricans are American citizens.

FUCK YOU, ICE. 🖕🖕🖕🖕

[House ⚔️ @mrmatthouse]

hey there delilah what’s it like in new orc city

[House ⚔️ @mrmatthouse]

take me down to the orc city where the grass is green and the girls are also green

[Shattered Table Taco @bgschnikelfritz]

I’m making potato salad for the first time. Do the raisins go on top as a garnish or inside the potato salad?

[Buitengebieden @buitengebieden]

The world needs this.. 😊