Mister John

I count stuff

[Mister John @somewiganbloke]

@OfficialTfGM @mygetmethere #networkwarrington @Merseytravel I live between networks. Ticketing options are confusing for border townships

[Mister John @somewiganbloke]

Can I use @OfficialTfGM @mygetmethere daysaver e-ticket on a #networkwarrington service?

[Mister John @somewiganbloke]

Which image is meant to offend me the most? #breastfeed #breastsdontcomeonplates

[NHS Blood Donation 🩸🩹 @GiveBloodNHS]

Got a resolution? Do something amazing and save or improve up to 3 lives in an hour. https://t.co/FGrnyQX4z5

[Mister John @somewiganbloke]

You refuse her boiled toffee (not even a purple one) again then, a cup of brown in the caff before waiting for the next bus #longtweet #end

[Mister John @somewiganbloke]

When you're at the front of the queue, you're back behind the old gran who stinks of camphor and Anais Anais (v) #longtweet

[Mister John @somewiganbloke]

That little baby with the blue coke bottle specs never taking her MASSIVELY magnified eyes off you (iv) #longtweet

[Mister John @somewiganbloke]

Hell, replete with shit steeped alchie tramps and chav mams on t'phone wi'babbie screamin fer chips (iii) #longtweet

[Mister John @somewiganbloke]

Hell, is being trapped in the bus station, waiting for your bus to the city, but there's never a bus turns up (ii) #longtweet

[Mister John @somewiganbloke]

My vision of hell came to me earlier. I'll describe it in as many tweets as it takes (i) #longtweet

[Mister John @somewiganbloke]

Whiskey with shortbread
Festive Christmas yuletide treat
Puked down the couch

#haiku #micropoetry #christmas2015

[Mister John @somewiganbloke]

@AsdaServiceTeam https://t.co/7wjuKv8y7I
this is the stuff! :-D

[Mister John @somewiganbloke]

@asda leftover leftovers... Really good #deliciousfoods #lobbygobblers

[Mister John @somewiganbloke]

@asda refried lobby, with a fresh shortcrust for me supper. Needs some pickle though #deliciousfoods

[Mister John @somewiganbloke]

@traffordcentre being both English and Lancastrian, I find your curt response most offensive

[Mister John @somewiganbloke]

I move to misappropriate the festival of Easter by shifting my December festivities. We must all be obnoxiously drunk for 3 weeks #Happy2016

[Mister John @somewiganbloke]

@traffordcentre I assure you they are upside down Lancashire roses. A tudor rose has white relief in the centre. Also with pip at 12 o'clock

[Mister John @somewiganbloke]

@mygetmethere how unsatisfying. I'll go back to paper tickets until you decide what you're doing with Get Me There in that case.

[Mister John @somewiganbloke]

@LEGO_Group had a lovely day today @LDCManchester @traffordcentre but thought there might be more for older kids and big kids. A bit sticky!

[Mister John @somewiganbloke]

Little plastic bricks everywhere. Tiny plastic people too. Exhausted, he lay in his pit, filled with pizza and good memories #vss