america’s next top beverage goblin

listens to podcasts at 1x speed. make of that what you will ✨🍄💃🏳️‍🌈🍜

[america’s next top beverage goblin @spacecatazz]

i don’t know who needs to hear this today but wash your ass

[america’s next top beverage goblin @spacecatazz]

@tigermouth

[america’s next top beverage goblin @spacecatazz]

@oshuaj @shutupno1cares things went south & he was admitted mon night. i texted with him throughout. got a reply from someone claiming to be his mom saying he passed on thurs afternoon.. still waiting for him to say "lol jk"..

[america’s next top beverage goblin @spacecatazz]

@uptwninmyuptwns @4everTae @iamthecrg @gothspiderbitch 14yr-olds and 18yr-olds go to high school together. this is like a 2nd year senior making out with a freshman. scandalous for high school gossip, maybe. hardly warrants a scumbag label, though.

[america’s next top beverage goblin @spacecatazz]

in honor of america i will be disappointing myself all day long 🇺🇸

[america’s next top beverage goblin @spacecatazz]

@Silsbycarr i def get like this was when my tummy shrinks. i want more so bad but tummy's like "woman if you even try it i'm bringing the hurt" -only child though

[america’s next top beverage goblin @spacecatazz]

@janellemiley Baudelaire

[america’s next top beverage goblin @spacecatazz]

ok hold on wait.. what is the point of a wedding website?? literally tell me i cannot wrap my head around it

[america’s next top beverage goblin @spacecatazz]

pls help me find all my shit i just lost it :)

[Rap Alert @rapalert6]

Juvenile and Mannie Fresh perform “Back That Azz Up” for NPR’s Tiny Desk concert.

[america’s next top beverage goblin @spacecatazz]

@tigermouth i discovered boom chicka pop’s version & danggg is it close!

[america’s next top beverage goblin @spacecatazz]

@tigermouth these days it feels like white glove grubhub 😌

[america’s next top beverage goblin @spacecatazz]

@PicturesFoIder 98% of all john hughes movies

[america’s next top beverage goblin @spacecatazz]

welp.

[america’s next top beverage goblin @spacecatazz]

@samgavinLA start paying attention to astrology memes & you’ll get it ;)

[america’s next top beverage goblin @spacecatazz]

@fatmanatee you gotta go slow, bro! at least 2 passes. also them older models where you dip your hands down into it aren’t as good as the new ones

[america’s next top beverage goblin @spacecatazz]

there are only two types of people: those who know how to use a dyson airblade & those who’d rather walk out the bathroom with soaking. wet. hands.

[america’s next top beverage goblin @spacecatazz]

turns out you’re not supposed to stretch before weight training aaahhhhhh my gains :(((

[america’s next top beverage goblin @spacecatazz]

@doubleblindmag @MichelleLhooq Q: why do insurance companies think ketamine therapy is “experimental” when it’s been used in hospitals to stop suicidal ideation in its tracks for 50 YEARS? it’s always been legal, & has many well known medicinal properties. what gives?

[america’s next top beverage goblin @spacecatazz]

@tigermouth pretty sure i saw it 6x in theaters, & i don’t feel *that* sorry for ppl who do things for funsies when they know the odds of dying are SUPER FUCKING HIGH

https://t.co/D5bfRATK1o

[america’s next top beverage goblin @spacecatazz]

@whaleburial my fist pounding arm, brah