steve

Usually asleep or having a midlife crisis in my 20s. Political Science grad, UC Berkeley alumni. Gamer. #Xbox #PS4

[steve @speakingofdice]

Do you vote on every twitter poll you see?

[steve @speakingofdice]

@PinkObsidian That’s because they were raised properly, I was raised by wolves

[steve @speakingofdice]

Anyone only eat half of the ramen noodles like it says to on the package or is that just an old wives tale?

[steve @speakingofdice]

@PinkObsidian I was far too greedy at 9

[steve @speakingofdice]

@SleepoBeepo

[steve @speakingofdice]

Today was a hot mess, just like me.

[steve @speakingofdice]

Good to know we’re all going to die soon probably.

[Business Insider India🇮🇳 @BiIndia]

A 'city-killer' asteroid got scarily close to Earth yesterday, and astronomers didn't know about it until it was just days away

https://t.co/oZAdsYw2kz

[steve @speakingofdice]

@SleepoBeepo

[steve @speakingofdice]

@SleepoBeepo We haven’t been in a drought for a while. The lakes are full, and only some of it is fish pee.

[steve @speakingofdice]

@SleepoBeepo My bread’s moldy

[steve @speakingofdice]

When life gives you lemons, file a case against life for harassment.

[steve @speakingofdice]

My phone and I have a lot in common because we both get lost and called repeatedly when I’m drunk

[steve @speakingofdice]

@SleepoBeepo Thought you were a bird

[steve @speakingofdice]

@IamJayRok @SleepoBeepo @ButtJuiceSoup @makemesomebacon @VampireSlug @ThanosDinosaur I should be flattered that my anti-aging estēe lauder creme i got from a white elephant party last year is working then

[steve @speakingofdice]

I’m tired of how much I misplace important things. I’m always losing my keys, phone, will to live, shoes, etc.

[steve @speakingofdice]

@VampireSlug I have more gambling in my blood than money in my bank account

[steve @speakingofdice]

I’ve lost so much in life... but I’ve lost far more in the #GTA5 online casino. 😔

[☣MrMetalman☣ @Mrmetalmangamin]

@speakingofdice @SleepoBeepo That feeling when you realize... youre a snail 🐌

[steve @speakingofdice]

It’s creepy to ask a woman for her number. That’s why I just wear a completely normal shirt with my own phone number that says “please call me I’m very lonely” instead.

[steve @speakingofdice]

Ahhh thanks bro 😁 my twitter was asleep for longer than a snail 🐌