Donny Speed

And so he says, I don't like the cut of your jib, and I go, I says it's the only jib I got, baby!

[Kristi Yamaguccimane @TheWapplehouse]

Posting this is the worst thing John Hinckley has ever done

[Donny Speed @speedtek]

@happymike @archeohistories The first sentence gave me a headache

[Kristi Yamaguccimane @TheWapplehouse]

He is no different than the Christian zealots that’ve cried “The End is Nigh” for 2,000 years and proclaim to be the only one that can save you. He has to drum up fiction to give his devoid life any meaning.

[Donny Speed @speedtek]

Apple bottom jeeeeeannnnnsss
Herp with the durrrrrrrrrrr

[Donny Speed @speedtek]

@Johnny_B_Rotten @Rob_Shenanigans How other people spend Cleveland taxpayers' money*

[Donny Speed @speedtek]

Oh gee wow

[Cleveland 19 News @cleveland19news]

Former Toledo Catholic school teacher, coach arrested for child sexual abuse material, FBI says https://t.co/dRvlDEcRSz

[Donny Speed @speedtek]

Happy for Garrett though. The Browns deserve zero good players.

[Donny Speed @speedtek]

I think the @Browns ultimate goal is to one day possess every pick in a single draft

[679 Enthusiast @marionumber4]

Child rapists when the Attorney General on their case is a Republican

[Donny Speed @speedtek]

@Nilkski_ @tommiLC I can never tell because they always have limo tint to hide their shame

[Donny Speed @speedtek]

@NBA I don't follow @NBA but for the last week or 2 this app has been putting this video in my feed several times per day... why?

[Kristi Yamaguccimane @TheWapplehouse]

I’m a small business owner and uncle of three nephews in Tempe, Arizona. I’m not concerned about a new pandemic and will do nothing to avoid it so long as the world’s ten richest men stand to once again double their wealth in three years.

[Donny Speed @speedtek]

@elonmusk God damn you are stupid.

[Donny Speed @speedtek]

lebron argues so much with the refs you'd think he'd know the rules of basketball by now

[Kristi Yamaguccimane @TheWapplehouse]

In a normally functioning society we would be █████████ █████ ██████ in a town square.

[Katherine Argent @effthealgorithm]

Search is full of ads and wrong answers. Every other email is an ad. Prime Video charges you and shows ads. Paramount? Ads. Peacock? YouTube? Hulu? Ads followed by more ads. Netflix full of ads. Meta and X, every other thing is an ad. Pinterest is nothing but ads. AI is in everything. AI finishes sentences incorrectly and won’t stop. AI reads your email and search history to target you with more ads. Every time you open an app or visit a site there’s an update making it worse. In a hurry? First, click here to agree to terms you don’t have time to read and must accept. You need an account to do that. Change your temporary password. Enter your 2FA code. Check your email and enter that code. Now use a passkey. Your password is too simple to remember. Change it. No, not like that. Now log on. Enter your 2FA code. Check your email for a code… Welcome back! We’ve updated our terms of service and privacy policy (you have none). Subscribe to the site. Subscribe to Netflix. Subscribe to toilet paper. Subscribe to these groceries. Pay a membership fee for the right to subscribe then tip your driver who delivers the subscriptions your membership lets you subscribe to. Time to work? We’ve got to update your laptop and will slow down everything you do until you agree to update. But first, click here to agree. Update installed — your laptop’s broken now. It doesn’t matter, since your boss just replaced you with AI. Go to your phone to complain on social media. Wait, your phone needs an update so we can add more AI. Click here. Oh sorry, your phone can’t handle this update. Now it’s useless. Go get the newest phone. Here’s a text from a friend, an email, a voice mail they left three days ago but you didn’t see until now because of sync problems with the cloud. It’s their GoFundMe. Their MLM. Their Patreon. Never mind, you didn’t respond to their text within 9 minutes and now you’re no longer friends. They blocked you. Make new friends. Download this app to find people in your area. In your neighborhood. On your street. Two doors down from you. Do you know this person yet, we think you’d get along. You need an account to use this app. That username is taken. Enter a password. Not that one, you used it on another site. You need to be connected to WiFi to download the app. Allow the app to connect to other devices on your network. Allow the app to access your contacts, know your precise location, store your credit card details. Oops, sorry, we got hacked now all that info is available on the web. There’s a class action suit. You can join. It’ll take a decade to get your $3.73 share of the ten billion settlement. We’ll send it via PayPal or deposit it to your bank, just tell us those details. Oh no, another hack. That info is circulating now, too. Here’s a spam call, a spam email, a spam text. Why are you angry? Why are you talking about getting rid of your phone? Why don’t you like AI, it lets us make all of this easier? Do you know how ridiculous that sounds? This is progress. You’ll be left behind. Do you want to be left behind? Do you???

[James Urbaniak @JamesUrbaniak]

J.D. Vance, whose new book is about his conversion to Catholicism, when asked about Trump's anti-Pope rant and Trump-as-Jesus pic:

[Kristi Yamaguccimane @TheWapplehouse]

It’s so cool our president is legally insane

[Kristi Yamaguccimane @TheWapplehouse]

We’re threatening to nuke a country that never attacked us and send barely out of high school troops to die because Americans buy trucks they don’t need that cost money they don’t have.