Casey Spitnale

99% jokes 1% hopes

[Casey Spitnale @spitnale]

Where have all the Cowboys gone?

[Casey Spitnale @spitnale]

Maybe I just need to crank that Soulja Boy

[Casey Spitnale @spitnale]

The people of Whoville got what they deserved

[Brian Fagan @bdfagan]

Remarkable statistic:

Prior to Western Michigan, college football teams were 110,352 - 0 when leading after the end of regulation, dating back to 1869.

[Casey Spitnale @spitnale]

If a mother can kill a baby inside the womb, the next step is that a mother can kill an infant outside the womb.

I have tried to find reality reasons for why people believe this girl is innocent. This is the next step in mental health.

[Casey Spitnale @spitnale]

straight coffee grounds.

[Clay Travis @ClayTravis]

Important announcement: I am upping my offer, $10 million dollars for a head-to-head basketball game between the defending WNBA champion Las Vegas Aces and a boy's high school state title team of my choice. If the Aces beat my team, I will give them $10 million.

[Casey Spitnale @spitnale]

@msftClarity Welcome to a completely useless dashboard.

[Casey Spitnale @spitnale]

@disneytipsguy Never again. It’s now a running joke in our family.

[Casey Spitnale @spitnale]

Trying to explain what a living sacrifice is to 1st graders.

[Casey Spitnale @spitnale]

I take pride in being the first to yell “new pitcher”

[Casey Spitnale @spitnale]

You don't even say thank you to me but you will say please and thank you to your AI.

[Casey Spitnale @spitnale]

Okay @Google

[Casey Spitnale @spitnale]

When AI responds with: LGTM. Who is "me"?

[Casey Spitnale @spitnale]

Is there popcorn at the Phil Whickham concert tonight?

[Casey Spitnale @spitnale]

Another Starlink price increase. $130/month

[Casey Spitnale @spitnale]

My daughter broke her collarbone but says Monday she has to play octopus in gym class and can’t have the sling on.

[Casey Spitnale @spitnale]

This is why LeBron is the best. When MJ left they were still good.

[Ballislife.com @Ballislife]

16 YEARS AGO TODAY
The Celtics upset the 61-win Cavs by eliminating them in 6 games despite 27 PTS, 19 REB, 10 AST from MVP LeBron James

LeBron signed with Miami 2 months later & the Cavs won an EC worst 19 games the following season

[Casey Spitnale @spitnale]

My friend who does not have access to my amazon is the worst online shopper in internet history.