Dorito Eater

He/Him. MtG and Metal. Opinions expressed here are done so poorly.

[Dorito Eater @stagemadness]

@gabnassif Limited superstar getting it done in modern, you love to see it.

[Dorito Eater @stagemadness]

I rerolled an entire roll of toilet paper by hand and he has the audacity to ask for it back? No, you can't fuckin have it back.

[Dorito Eater @stagemadness]

@megachiles This is almost certainly wrong but I have nothing to refute your claim.

[Dorito Eater @stagemadness]

This is a way to make your pisses more interesting than the normal ones.

[Dorito Eater @stagemadness]

Standard pissing position is at "6 o'clock" relative to the toilet bowl and I'm here to say if your life needs some spice, try "8:30" and you'll feel like you're below deck on an old sailboat.

[Dorito Eater @stagemadness]

@AllieGolem It's already triggered and they'd shuffle.

[Dorito Eater @stagemadness]

My hobby oak project looks like it has a little bear snout.

[Dorito Eater @stagemadness]

Muscle guy who forgot to cut his shirt to expose nipples, navel, and lats: "Aw shoot. Frick. Dang it."

[Dorito Eater @stagemadness]

@korlamasters STAY IN LINE

[Dorito Eater @stagemadness]

@tim_in_mpls Hell yeah brother

[Dorito Eater @stagemadness]

Me (cracking open a cold one): "Daddy likey. Yum yum."

[Dorito Eater @stagemadness]

@JoeThrashnkill Finally someone fuckin gets it.

[Dorito Eater @stagemadness]

@hipearlrose But we really need the rain

[Dorito Eater @stagemadness]

Fuckin perfectly round billboard for expressing modern fashion (baseball hats)

[Dorito Eater @stagemadness]

Cul-de-sac dads watching the rain from their garages, arms crossed. "We really needed this rain" we'd say, if we allowed ourselves to be that vulnerable.

[Dorito Eater @stagemadness]

@derzquist Your maturity and level-headedness, sicken me.

[Dorito Eater @stagemadness]

@tony_damiano Grill Master.

[Dorito Eater @stagemadness]

@shawngude You should get started!

[Dorito Eater @stagemadness]

@MysticalDisPod @twoduckcubed @theGGards Inject me with this sweet discourse.

[Dorito Eater @stagemadness]

@Jason_Aldean Millionaire chickenshit.