Mark Chillag

[Mark Chillag @star55]

http://t.co/yKmrD3eqny Ever been so drunk that you cooked a pizza at 20 degrees for 350 minutes?

[Mark Chillag @star55]

As if being a surgeon wasn't enough you're a general too? http://t.co/uT2KqhnaSM

[Mark Chillag @star55]

http://t.co/mVuQuHovWZ I do this fun trick at parties where no one there likes me so I don’t go.

[Mark Chillag @star55]

I'm pretty sure the whole "ladies first" thing was created by a guy just to check out ass. http://t.co/yNVx9T3Ai1

[Mark Chillag @star55]

If your bathroom sink looks like mine, you're disgusting and I'm a hypocrite. http://t.co/Z5VEUDfhya

[Mark Chillag @star55]

Big deal, McDonalds. We're all here for a limited time only. http://t.co/kXZrEtdbwU

[Mark Chillag @star55]

When my swear jar gets full I'm gonna use the money to buy a motherfucking puppy! http://t.co/R4jPZpYlcL

[Mark Chillag @star55]

http://t.co/GywTSE6eYQ I'm tired of women touching and playing with it but no one wants to blow it. Damn vuvuzelas!

[Mark Chillag @star55]

http://t.co/QoYyGzfPFb If you have more than zero bumper stickers on your car you have too many.

[Mark Chillag @star55]

http://t.co/Ak2EIB3opl I bet when you go to hell they make you wear your hair like you did in 5th grade

[Mark Chillag @star55]

Is there anything sexier than a woman who reads? Yes: Models. http://t.co/vnH5ziXyrx

[Mark Chillag @star55]

http://t.co/Oiq6OqqYbZ Ceilings were just ambitious walls.

[Mark Chillag @star55]

http://t.co/PN0DDDb5zB Some people are about as useful as the "r" in February.

[Mark Chillag @star55]

#oscarmystery the cube from transformers

[Mark Chillag @star55]

"It's not you, it's me. " - twins looking at family photos http://t.co/SkQeXj5xMv

[Mark Chillag @star55]

Family size or very determined single person size? http://t.co/PtzSi7kW

[Mark Chillag @star55]

http://t.co/4SOaBuUw Google just returned 3,250,000,000 results for my search. Cancel my afternoon appointments.

[Mark Chillag @star55]

New Weight Loss Craze Raspberry Ketones Diet http://t.co/TOXXTU8B

[Mark Chillag @star55]

Raspberry Ketone supplement really works for weight loss http://t.co/UquvLG52

[Mark Chillag @star55]

Raspberry Ketone is the new way to naturally lose weight! http://t.co/6AT4cwSj