barbara

mayor of pound town

[barbara @stbabs75]

your man saw my tweets and now his phone “fell into a jug of milk” and doesn’t work. honey that’s not milk 🥸

[barbara @stbabs75]

barb would join the army but unfortunately my bosoms are far too large to fit in their uniforms or their barracks. honey I would put the rack in barracks but I simply cannot!

[barbara @stbabs75]

call me a staple of british lunches the way I want his cheese in my ham sandwich 😫

[Missy Perez @missyperez]

The fact that I’ve seen this at least 35 times today and am still laughing like it’s the first time needs to be studied.

[barbara @stbabs75]

insomniac barb is back and she is late for work

[barbara @stbabs75]

polls? yes please

[barbara @stbabs75]

toss up state this toss up state that. more like who up tossing this salad

[barbara @stbabs75]

oh yes honey! midterms. he could get in the mid of my moist terms. My terms and cuntitions. You wish you were me. I’ll house his representatives

[barbara @stbabs75]

i thought they had to have elections? this doesn’t seem very electoral college of them.

[barbara @stbabs75]

oh yeah he’s super honest and always last to finish at a small orgy. very forthcoming.

[eviee is marrying rosalina @shrineofeviee]

.

[🪷ً @ethereaIised]

she looks like Big Birds pussy

[oontz oontz @knotBoots]

This is unfortunately extremely funny

[barbara @stbabs75]

oh. let me tell you. I’ve got BIG expectations. huge if you will. my expectations? massive. you know what else is massive? My knowledge of post-Victorian dynamics of hunter gatherer communities within the wider Swedish community. unh

[barbara @stbabs75]

after that. cook him steak with grilled cheese

[barbara @stbabs75]

oh. releasing my single barbology. loosely based on vibeology by Paula Abdul. and by loosely I mean it’s an exact replica and my grip on reality is loose. oh. Horny horns. Go Barbara . Go Barbara. Go go barbra. Ooh. Work it Baybay. I give you those vibes. I’m in the funky way

[barbara @stbabs75]

YOU CANT HANDLE ALL THIS PUSSY

[barbara @stbabs75]

ay papi si si senyor

[barbara @stbabs75]

call me miss continental the way my ass is the size of the Americas. And your man wants to eat me for breakfast. uh

[barbara @stbabs75]

have you noticed there aren’t as many songs out about being thick juicy and sexy since the barb hiatus. oh. makes you think doesn’t it. I just know they STAY stalking this page for lyric inspo about being more bodacious than the large big-breasted tit if it wasn’t a bird

[barbara @stbabs75]

oh YES hunny. you want a bit of this? you wish. come and GYETT IT. you wish you could barb. me? gongaga.