steffi 🦦

Retweets are ringing endorsements. LA to Vegas’ # 1 fan DO NOT FOLLOW ME.

[steffi 🦦 @steffib817]

How do I make this my email signature

[steffi 🦦 @steffib817]

As an unattractive woman I also shouldn’t have to know what it is

[lil piss baby @11kmrn]

as a beautiful woman, i shouldn’t know what sharepoint is

[hope hopes hoping @hopes_revenge]

your thirties are so weird because it’s like oh im gonna die soon

[steffi 🦦 @steffib817]

Yeah and what about it

[Moira Donegan @MoiraDonegan]

When someone drinks a lot of Diet Coke you know that they have psychiatric problems

[Barber @ballisticbarber]

low engagement is not gonna stop me. I talk to myself in real life too

[femiiiiii. @femiiiszn]

not all of us were made to cook. some of us were made to have conversations with the person cooking.

[Isaac @isaacturnersong]

I was doing like an advanced kind of joke where it isnt funny

[steffi 🦦 @steffib817]

There will never be another tom jones

[kramerica industries @hepimp]

her : “you better not be watching Tom Jones duetting with EMF on Unbelievable when I get home!”

me :

[annika💒 @simulacrababy]

do not fucking call a sandwich a “sando” in front of me i will kill you

[steffi 🦦 @steffib817]

I reply quickly because if I don’t respond immediately after reading it I will simply forget it exists

[Auren Hoffman @auren]

the thing most correlated with great employees is how fast they reply to emails.
not sure there's a close second.

[stevie @adultmomband]

(horrors beyond comprehension happening all around me) hey i think my Zoloft isn’t working

[Josh Martin @JoshMartinMpls]

On Presidents’ Day, I’m proud to celebrate our President - by which of course I mean Minneapolis City Council President Elliott Payne.

[g @34rths]

I don't feel particularly proud of myself But I have a job and at least three friends so Girl whatever

[clare @sadderlizards]

i don’t know what i’m doing with my life i was supposed to be born as a mushroom growing out of a log

[clare @sadderlizards]

i feel a lot like this creature

[steffi 🦦 @steffib817]

@megannn_lynne I hope you go to this particular Dairy Queen https://t.co/PVzGdwtKix

[temple runner @misscalcula]

i’m pretty chill as far as insane women go

[steffi 🦦 @steffib817]

@sonyashea3 I was there!!!