not steph

annoyed human (she/they)

[not steph @stephhmitchell]

I need Tinder but for like making friends because I’m 22 and I have no idea how you’re supposed to make new friends as an adult lol

[Janel Comeau 🍁 @VeryBadLlama]

hey sorry I missed your text, I am processing a non-stop 24/7 onslaught of information with a brain designed to eat berries in a cave

[Washington State Dept. of Natural Resources @waDNR]

If he:

-Changes his entire look for you
-Travels 1,900 miles upstream to chase you
-Procreates and dies
-Replenishes an entire ecosystem with his carcass

He's not your valentine, he's a Chinook salmon

[Sherry @SchrodingrsBrat]

Girls should bring up astrology on a first date.

Not because it’s an accurate measure of compatibility, but because it self-identifies men who are arrogant, condescending, and incapable of entertaining opinions they disagree with.

[Soulja Brasi @iamsouljabrasi]

Scorpio: I can’t wait for my birthday! It’s gonna be lit!!!
Scorpios on their birthday:

[Charlie James @malecowgirl]

it's not depression if you're looking out the window. that's brooding. it's how poems happen.

[carmencita @CarFrita]

I may be unhinged now but at one point I was “a pleasure to have in class”

[Icona @iconawrites]

Are you “burned out” or are you having a reasonable reaction to a never-ending barrage of bad news which you can do very little about.

[DIVINE🌺 @sheluvyarii]

Stop being the one who makes all the effort. Sit back and let the ship sink.

[ඞ @lifeinchaos_]

Mfs get a Macbook and all of a sudden got work to do in public places

[Teresa Wright @ReporterTeresa]

Listening to residents who rejected the halfway house in Summerside on the radio talking about how they’re somehow seeing increased police presence (nothing has even moved ahead yet) - is pretty ridiculous.

The lack of compassion for those in need of rehabilitation is deafening

[ely kreimendahl @ElyKreimendahl]

me to everyone: your sadness is valid and important, just let yourself feel it

me to me: SNAP OUT OF IT DUMBASS

[toxic king @toxicking]

June is next week? Time flies when your life is falling apart