STEVE

[STEVE @stevebloz]

@Wario64 Looks like a spiritual successor to NBA Street/Jam 👀

[STEVE @stevebloz]

@__________Nadia That’s the girl from Silent Hill 2. Glad she’s enjoying herself.

[STEVE @stevebloz]

@wariocolosseum

[STEVE @stevebloz]

Sources close to Steve have vehemently denied rumors of a return to X, but leaked audio from Eric suggests otherwise. Eric was heard saying Steve "got the bug again" - This contradicts earlier statements and reignited speculation about a return, just months after his abrupt exit.

[STEVE @stevebloz]

LEAKED AUDIO FUELS SPECULATION, DESPITE DENIALS

[STEVE @stevebloz]

#BREAKING Steve's Twitter Account Permanently Deleted After More Than 30 Days of Deactivation: A Conclusive End to an Era

[STEVE @stevebloz]

BREAKING: STEVE HAS AN 11-YEAR-OLD DAUGHTER HE HAS BEEN HIDING SINCE 2013. NEVER WATCHED FROZEN WITH HER.

[STEVE @stevebloz]

Steve was caught at Cumberland Farms telling the cashier "I should've been on that court last night", regarding the UConn game

Steve has never played any form of basketball and did not attend UConn. He hasn't even participated in club track.

[STEVE @stevebloz]

Anonymous Source: Stephen realized that the standard wedding gift is now $150 due to inflation.

Sources close to the assclown says he doesn't feel guilty because he included dumb-but-practical gifts in addition to the $100, so it rounds up to "like $150 I guess".

[STEVE @stevebloz]

RUMOR: Steve spotted at church parking lot. Sources say he recorded several seltzer reviews but got flustered and started name-dropping people he was mad at.

Source has indicated that THREE people catch strays after he spilled Seltzer on himself.

[STEVE @stevebloz]

STEVE'S NINE-YEAR FIESTA FLING OVER?

After nearly a decade of cruising around the 203 in his trusty Fiesta, Steve has been spotted checking out new vehicles.

Sources say that Steve has always loved his car, but this development has us wondering if he's finally ready to move on.

[STEVE @stevebloz]

Friends and family are urging Steve to seek help, but he's reportedly refusing to listen. "He's convinced that the only thing that can cure his cravings is a Swedish Fish gelato," said a concerned relative. "We're just worried that he's going to do something crazy."

[STEVE @stevebloz]

STEVE "CRAVING CRITICALLY" FOR SWEDISH FISH GELATO

Sources close to the idiot say he's been on a Swedish Fish hunt for days, scouring every store and freezer in sight. "He's just not the same without his fix," one insider revealed.

[STEVE @stevebloz]

BREAKING: Steve and Joe Coury are on "speaking terms"

This Year It Was Rumored The Two Haven't Spoken in Months, Skipping Christmas Gifts 😮

[STEVE @stevebloz]

And a Mario Sports game. Probably baseball or something.

[STEVE @stevebloz]

Steve's Nintendo Direct predictions

[STEVE @stevebloz]

BREAKING Steve is on "Ozempic or something" and drinking "several" cans of Coke Zero. Family and friends worried.

[STEVE @stevebloz]

Stephen is rumored to be making his return to Planet Fitness after a falling out in 2015

[STEVE @stevebloz]

You'll see what this means soon

[STEVE @stevebloz]

@stevebloz FACT CHECK: Steve hasn't smoked since he dog sat for Auntie Sharon in 2008. He stole his uncle's cigs and got a bad headache and vowed to never smoke again.