Steve Stifler

Steve Stifler is here Bitches! (Parody Account)

[Steve Stifler @SteveStifIler]

"Friend: ""Omg, your parents are so nice!"" ...

[Steve Stifler @SteveStifIler]

I'd rather look back at my life and say "I can't believe I did that" instead of saying, "I wish I did that."

[Steve Stifler @SteveStifIler]

Some people are just beautifully wrapped boxes of bullshit.

[Steve Stifler @SteveStifIler]

Sarcasm is like my first language.

[Steve Stifler @SteveStifIler]

6th grade conversation: hey hey wats up nm wbu same cool so who do u like you oh ok do u like me yea lets date ok ily ily2

[Steve Stifler @SteveStifIler]

Getting paid to sleep.. That's my dream job.

[Steve Stifler @SteveStifIler]

me: i'm sorry, it's just it's been a bad day me: of a tough week me: of a bad month me: of a terrible year me: of a dreadful existence

[Steve Stifler @SteveStifIler]

shitday shitday shitday shitday friday saturday sunday shitday

[Steve Stifler @SteveStifIler]

That scary moment when you put a ring on your finger and can't take it off.

[Steve Stifler @SteveStifIler]

parents: you spend too much time on your phone, it's like you're addicted me: fine can i go out parents: no

[Steve Stifler @SteveStifIler]

"Ass or boobs?" "Her heart" Choo Choo here comes the gay train

[Steve Stifler @SteveStifIler]

do u ever just see the first sentence of a text message and just think “oh fuck no i do not have time for this shit”

[Steve Stifler @SteveStifIler]

parents: you spend too much time on your phone, it's like you're addicted me: fine can i go out parents: no

[Steve Stifler @SteveStifIler]

I AM GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE MOUTH WITH MY OWn mouth softly because i like u

[Steve Stifler @SteveStifIler]

When I'm bored, nobody texts me. When I'm busy, my phone blows up!

[Steve Stifler @SteveStifIler]

me after just cleaning my room: wow, I am never letting my room get messy again! the next day: has anyone seen…

[Steve Stifler @SteveStifIler]

If I can't be weird around you, we can't be friends.

[Steve Stifler @SteveStifIler]

during a math test: me: my answer = 23 answer choices: 170, 195, 264, 362 me: well 170 is closest to 23, so that must be the answer 😂

[Steve Stifler @SteveStifIler]

It's better to be late than to arrive ugly.

[Steve Stifler @SteveStifIler]

why do i still think that anyone born after 2000 is 4 years old