Jacob Daniel

[Jacob Daniel @stulpius]

this is up

[Jacob Daniel @stulpius]

you ready to receive your second dose of mesothelioma ?

[Jacob Daniel @stulpius]

check out my graffiti, austin texas

[Jacob Daniel @stulpius]

When I was 18, my older sister, now a pediatric dentist and retired Colonel in the Air Force, told me to write down a 5 year plan, a 10 year plan, and a 20 year plan. I failed to write anything down as she, among others of her gender, have always been mean to me. I had one plan in mind, and that was to have sex once with a female celebrity.
I'd imagine it would take more than 20 years, but through perseverance using procrastination and improvisation as my top qualities, I managed to do so after I turned 38 while meticulously creating the perfect antagonist of feminism with unbeatable masculinity.

My masculinity is much different than today's standards. (insert random AI generated text including 10 more paragraphs about how i got a feminist celebrity to rape me while i was sleeping who is known for being a model and having a decent body for a feminist. And by decent body, I just mean her body paragraphs in her non fiction novels)

Conclusion:

The biggest irony about perseverance and procrastination is that its abbreviation is P.P.

[Jacob Daniel @stulpius]

A sports commentor said a guy had beauty and brains, and was from colonbia. i get mixed up between colon and rectum...

was she talking about colonel sanders? he's handsome like a peacock that sells chicken. is a colon a rectum aka penis? i get these definitions mixed up all the time 😒

[Jacob Daniel @stulpius]

i popped/ripped/teared a hemorrhoid after reading the slogan numerous times a week and went to the doctor. She didn't believe me and said i needed prooforation. whatever that meant... 😒

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