𝔢𝔩𝔢𝔫𝔞

cw: 105lbs ugw: 82lbs | ednos/POTS | 23 lesbian she/they | fatphobic

[𝔢𝔩𝔢𝔫𝔞 @stup1dcals]

the past few days I’ve been restricting better and easier than i ever have and I’ve noticed a few things so I’m gonna make a thread so i don’t forget

[𝔢𝔩𝔢𝔫𝔞 @stup1dcals]

hey i started working full time at a desk so im back lol

[𝔢𝔩𝔢𝔫𝔞 @stup1dcals]

reminder to my moots that anorexia causes high cholesterol. just got lab results back today showing high cholesterol levels. i am 23 and 105 lbs.

please be safe

[𝔢𝔩𝔢𝔫𝔞 @stup1dcals]

@soprimitive check all over the sky, i can’t see them with my eyes but if you set the “long exposure” or night setting thing on ur camera all the way to ten seconds it’ll show up just stay still when its taking the pic!

[𝔢𝔩𝔢𝔫𝔞 @stup1dcals]

this is mostly a joke but i wish i had ortho just because after years of being junkorexic as shit i think my body needs it

[𝔢𝔩𝔢𝔫𝔞 @stup1dcals]

i don’t have a problem with being say, 120 lbs. but i do have a problem with gaining 15 pounds in order to get there

[𝔢𝔩𝔢𝔫𝔞 @stup1dcals]

does anyone else feel like now that they’re smaller they can never go back up again? like i want to gain a little back so i can have tits and stuff but in my head i can’t do that because I’ll be seen as having “gained weight”.

[𝔢𝔩𝔢𝔫𝔞 @stup1dcals]

and like not because it’ll look bad or I’ll be fat, but because i am smaller now and i have to GAIN it back to get there. if i had never lost this weight i would be way more comfy with it, but having people know that i was this small and am not anymore is so scary

[𝔢𝔩𝔢𝔫𝔞 @stup1dcals]

i should call her

[𝔢𝔩𝔢𝔫𝔞 @stup1dcals]

coming to terms with the fact that it’s by body shape that sucks and no amount of weight loss can fix it makes me so fucking suicidal

[𝔢𝔩𝔢𝔫𝔞 @stup1dcals]

im like if a skinny girl was fat

[𝔢𝔩𝔢𝔫𝔞 @stup1dcals]

I’m at the point where i feel mostly mentally ready to recover and have an ass and tits again however i am absolutely not financially ready to get a complete new wardrobe. why is this never talked about as a barrier to recovery.

[𝔢𝔩𝔢𝔫𝔞 @stup1dcals]

got my appetite back with a vengeance omg i need to start omading again and i really am not looking forward to it

[𝔢𝔩𝔢𝔫𝔞 @stup1dcals]

imagine: a lesbian who is not in love with her ex. too bad they don’t exist

[𝔢𝔩𝔢𝔫𝔞 @stup1dcals]

girl I’m talking to said something about her being with other people in the future 😀😀

my bad gang i thought we were gonna get married sorry ill go delete the Pinterest board

[𝔢𝔩𝔢𝔫𝔞 @stup1dcals]

the post nut clarity that comes after u bust while thinking about someone is diabolical omg I’m over here feeling like a pervert for no reason

[𝔢𝔩𝔢𝔫𝔞 @stup1dcals]

ngl i look tiny in this

[𝔢𝔩𝔢𝔫𝔞 @stup1dcals]

the cool this about me is you can take complete advantage of me and literally treat me like absolute shit and i will still love you endlessly and give you infinite chances

[𝔢𝔩𝔢𝔫𝔞 @stup1dcals]

saw this on ig and it ruined my day how can you be this skinny and still have tits like this??? i am BARELY underweight and i am a AA cup

[𝔢𝔩𝔢𝔫𝔞 @stup1dcals]

my irls are engaged and pregnant and I’m scared of olive oil be so for real

[𝔢𝔩𝔢𝔫𝔞 @stup1dcals]

I’m almost 23 years old i should have a 401k not an eating disorder 😭😭😭😭 this shit so embarrassing

[𝔢𝔩𝔢𝔫𝔞 @stup1dcals]

I’m almost 23 years old i should have a 401k not an eating disorder 😭😭😭😭 this shit so embarrassing