Stand wherever you want about polygamy, but for people for whom polygamy is a thing in their paradigm, it’s moronic to say “another person’s husband”. In fact, it’s a misogynistic label designed to do nothing but shame & attack the new wife. It’s why I opined about the weirdness of the ‘engagement’ (another issue with this whole charade btw) when it was announced as “2nd wife in the bag. Polygamy has won”, instead of just a simple nikāh announcement.
It’s her nikāh for goodness, a major milestone in her life, and here it’s being reduced to a mere propaganda tool for insensitive, emotionally unintelligent and just frankly, largely senseless “polygyny bros” (I’ve once clarified what this means, and it doesn’t mean anyone polygamous or that intends to practice it).
I know people who hate the sharī’ah would complain regardless, no matter the circumstances of a polygynous marriage, but the way some people go about things doesn’t help things & this situation is an example of that. Farcical handling for a large part of it, and also a classical example of why being ‘famous’ & in constant public eyes, particularly mainly for non-Islamic or non-objectively values/moral based reasons will never appeal to me. Kudos to people that choose to marry those, because it can’t & won’t be me, in sha Allaah.
I’m here to sha remind women about my own agenda for them to be as intentional about their own rights too as men have shown to do & will always do. In this life, it’s Allaah first, then YOURSELF.
If you like, accept fātihah for your mahr. If you like, don’t be insistent on getting provided for in terms of all your essentials, including cooking utensils & other similar items to help you settle that they’ve culturally turned to you & your family’s responsibility (yes I’m stubborn & repetitive. Cry 🌚). If you like, don’t pursue your halal financial independence (which doesn’t have to be office job, and which he absolutely doesn’t have the right to stop you from). If you like, stay & endure all sorts of nonsense that internally kills you & cause you unbearable harm you because of all the gaslighting about divorce (of course only when necessary).
At the end of the day, both men and women cannot do without the other, no matter how much these folks try to make you think it’s just a feminine issue. “Nobody will marry you”, I promise you nobody will marry them too if y’all stand on business & start being similarly intentional about your desires and rights. “Marriage is not just about rights”, lol, I pity you. Classic كلمت حق يراد بها باطل.
Half a word is enough for the wise sha. May Allaah rectify us all and may he grant good people good people and only allow the demons across both aisles to find one another.
Some Muslim men, especially “polygyny bros”, have fraudulently pushed the “you’re not allowed to hate it”, aggressively & in a non-contextual manner so much to hide the reality of what the sharī’ah truly allows/disallows. This is why it’s important to oppose them.
A Muslim woman is allowed to hate it for herself (being applied on her), to not like some inherent aspects of it, to be wary and cautious in its general practice and application, but the line is to not hate the fact that Allaah has *allowed* it in (caveated) principle as a right for men (not even necessarily recommended or obligated fundamentally).
She’s even allowed to stipulate it as an automatic voiding condition of her nikāah, where she can just pack and leave if she can’t bear it. Literally only thing she can’t do is stop the man, as it isn’t her right just like there are unique rights Allaah has granted her as well.
I’ve previously written a thread on gendered rights in Islam & you can check it out at your convenience. 👇🏾
First class is easier to make in Private Uni.
Not because the lecturers give it out for free but because your hard work really reflect in your result unlike Uni where A is for God🙂
Congratulations Gold. See you in Court❤️
I don’t have a business to promote here. I’m simply looking for scholarship opportunities for MSc/PhD programs abroad to further my research interests.
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I graduated as the best graduating student in pharmacy UDUS with a CGPA of 4.91/5.0.
• Broke the record for highest CGPA ever recorded in the faculty.
• 20 individual awards.
• BGS in 4/6 departments.
• Awarded Top 20 most influential students.
Alhamdullilah.
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Two years ago, you had problems you don't even remember. But it seemed like such a big deal at the time, didn't it? And yet... here you are. This, too, shall pass.
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At some point in your 20s, you’ll be struck by an overwhelming sense of self doubt and uncertainty about your future and goals. It’s important to remain calm. It will all work out.
BSc Civil Engineering (CGPA: 4.43/5.0).
Department of Civil Engineering, OAU.
- Best Graduating Female Student;
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Alhamdulilah.
Allahumma baarik alayk, Khadijah❤️.
PUBLIC ANNOUNCEMENT FROM THE FAMILY OF LATE ALHAJI DAWUD AROGUNDADE
AlhamduliLlah, after exactly one month of uncertainty and deep concern, our beloved Muhammad Arogundade has been found and is now safely reunited with his family.
We are sincerely grateful to everyone who stood by us during this trying time. JazaakumuLlahu khayran for your heartfelt prayers, your calls, your messages, and the joint prayer sessions many of you organized or joined. Your kindness, concern, and unwavering support meant more than words can express.
To those who followed up, checked in, and offered help in ways both big and small—may Allah reward you abundantly. We trust in your continued understanding and cooperation.
With gratitude and peace,
The Dawud Arogundade Family