Sydney 🦆

You can be a king or a street sweeper, but everyone dances with the grim reaper.

[Sydney 🦆 @sydann6]

I just got hit in the head by a crow

[Sydney 🦆 @sydann6]

I’ve discovered something magical: my bathtub is magnetic so I can magnet my shower curtain down so it doesn’t attack me

[Sydney 🦆 @sydann6]

You say this 100 times every year

[NicoleD @tourneygirl]

I hate Christmas…there I said it

[Sydney 🦆 @sydann6]

People who existed before Google: did you have to have a dictionary on hand when playing scrabble?

[Sydney 🦆 @sydann6]

You know it never really occurred to me that the international space station wouldn’t have to abide by gravity when designing it? No need for stairs, no walk way, need another room? Sure just stack it on top! Need somewhere to sleep? Here’s a bunch of crevices in every direction

[Sydney 🦆 @sydann6]

So my work raised the cost of our mandatory disability benefits, cut our 12 sick days down to 10, and then gave us a 15¢ raise to make up for it. A raise which ups our disability benefit payments again.

[Sydney 🦆 @sydann6]

Will historians 200 years in the future have trouble dating photos based off clothing? Seeing how popular 90s-00s clothing is now

[Sydney 🦆 @sydann6]

My lovely boyfriend has facial nerve damage and I’m sure appreciates it so much when I tell him his two favourite pastimes (drinking coffee and smoking cigarettes) make it way worse

[Sydney 🦆 @sydann6]

Honestly they should make advent calendars year round, I want a little treat every single day

[Sydney 🦆 @sydann6]

Re purposing my 2” plant pots as water for paint brushes and clay since I let all my plants die

[Sydney 🦆 @sydann6]

Do the youths nowadays know about out for a rip

[Sydney 🦆 @sydann6]

Told my dad I wanted a Michaels gift card for Christmas. He said “that’s boring” this man has given me straight cash and socks for the past two years cause he didn’t know what else to get me

[Sydney 🦆 @sydann6]

Last night at 9:08pm both 96.9 and 100.3 were both playing brain stew by green day like 1/2 second off from each other

[Sydney 🦆 @sydann6]

After 13 hours waiting they gave him and IV and sent him home. Where he’s now in more pain than before

[Sydney 🦆 @sydann6]

Waited with my bf for 6.5hrs in the ER to finally get called…. To sit in a different waiting room. Had to leave him after 7hrs cause my $12 parking expired

[Sydney 🦆 @sydann6]

@FrndsAndSwfties Listen while I’m sleeping, in the car, at work all day, while I’m home. 209.5 days straight

[Sydney 🦆 @sydann6]

I love being a manager to people who are 20+ years older than me cause I can say something as simple as don’t put canvas in the shredder it causes jams and they argue with me about it

[Sydney 🦆 @sydann6]

Thank god I get paid 3 more times before Christmas

[Sydney 🦆 @sydann6]

Skipped my grandmas birthday party for a work event and I won a PS5, kinda worth it

[Sydney 🦆 @sydann6]

Once again the case of the missing sweatshirt was solved when I opened my moms closet