Jay Schneider

Taco12Pack handle for sale. Serious inquiries only.

[Jay Schneider @Taco12Pack]

Christmas tip: keep the church services fresh by replacing "amen" with "totes" wherever possible.

[Raymond Summerlin @RMSummerlin]

Bill Simmons could conservatively charge $500 per download for the next episode of his podcast.

[Derek Heckman @herekdeckman]

Learned today that Ken’s wife Cynthia is Alex Mack, which I think gives Ken’s ultimate decision to work for Dow an added layer

[ArtButMakeItSports @ArtButSports]

@Complex Petit disque orange (rotated), by František Kupka, 1932

[Midwest vs. The Rest @midwestern_ope]

They should bring an NFL team here

[ArtButMakeItSports @ArtButSports]

Hercules and Nessus, by Giambologna, 1599

[Sam Winkler @ThatSamWinkler]

Sometimes when nothing is funny I watch the part from Too Funny to Fail where the timeslot ad makes Colbert break so hard he’s reduced to silent tears

[Mikael @BacardiCapital]

A credit card but instead of cash back you get Touch Tune credits

[Sean Francis @musingmymind]

RIP to a real one

[Kirk Henderson @KirkSeriousFace]

The implication that LeBron James has been killing kids with Sprite for 25 years

[Fitz @FitzGSN_]

Jalen Brunson

[Brooks Otterlake @i_zzzzzz]

Wemby can’t summon the hate required to win when he’s playing against a walkable city

[Trick Forever @khiazmos]

I like Hunter Biden because he isn’t one of those guys that gets sober and then pretends being a degenerate isn’t insanely fun

[Hunter Biden @HunterBiden]

@SoundDobad I know this may sound petty, but I can’t stand it when people put photoshop a meth pipe in my mouth. A crack pipe doesn’t have that little bowl at the end. This is why we can’t trust AI. Please make the appropriate edit. Thank you for your attention to this matter.

[Hans Fiene 🦬 @HansFiene]

Sorry, but there's no way you're building a billion mile long ship for sixteen dollars

[David Rattigan @davidmrattigan]

buying this and then dying immediately and forcing my descendants to finish building it over the next 100 years

[The Possum @PessimistPossum]

@ABC We're right on track @MikeJudge