Sometimes Chinese technicians, engineers and government give me a sense that they’re accidentally bumped into something like Claude that gives them endless advices, ideas they merged the advices anf ideas, what they inherited from their ancestors, what they could come up with using imagination, mindset, social norm and the ego to show off their talents that they suppressed for years to be a part of everything in this world until they could surpass who they learned from and show off their new technology endless creativity in such hastily manners. Doesn’t matter if they’re fully understood or fully check fatal issues, they must jeopardize all creation before someone else could discover the similar technology like Claude or using what they accidentally found out - or whatever similar friendship they could form in the last 5 years with the group that secretly supported the China nation……There must be something or someone in China that interests those creatures/people/forces. Just my wild guest, don’t quote me in this. Whatever it was, they turned the Great China into great flashy nation but they didn’t give it all, the level of trust is still 50%. They are waiting for the delivery of something, some materials, a person, or knowledge, ……
In the situation that I’m not even sure it’s real.
Sometimes I tell myself the X-ray beam under the floor is only a fear, only a thought that won’t leave me alone. But if it is true… then there is nothing I can do.
I can’t turn the machine off, I can’t reach out to check it myself. It’s like the mind game that made me paranoid and made me want yo leave the house. I can’t stop the beam that keeps shining upward through the floor, or downward through the roof, day and night. If I couldn’t find another job somewhere else, and I have nowhere to go, No way to leave, This small bunker is the only option then I have to deal with it. Hopefully there’s possibly it could change me into immortal or mutant LOL
So if the X-ray beam is really coming up through the floor, day after day, into my bones and the soft places that make my blood… then I must simply live with it. That is the only choice that remains.
I still hope the gods are watching. I still hope something kind can see me here. It is the only light I have left to hold.