dad

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[dad @tenboobs]

Just realized that squid games is just human mario party

[dad @tenboobs]

Hiii

[⭐️IT GIRL⭐️ @aliyahInterlude]

top female experiences :
1. realizing you’re fine shyt
2. dating that demon at 19
3. hating your mom
4. “that’s was weird but prolly not SA”
5. smoking too much weed
6. realizing your guy friend wants to fuck u

[dad @tenboobs]

Had a bad day at work so im gna curl up in bed n jerk away my sorrows

[dad @tenboobs]

Ive neeeeever understood waiting or taking it slow. Why r we letting some weird socially constructed notion of “appropriately timed consummation” get in the way of two consenting adults who are in the mood

[dad @tenboobs]

Tapioca pearls in boba being called “toppings” does not sit right with me. They should be called bottomings

[dad @tenboobs]

If u ever catch me willingly listening to cigarettes after sex just know my mental health is in the shitter and authorities should be alerted

[dad @tenboobs]

Oh btw the quantity & quality of my shitpostjng directly correlates w my zoloft dosage

[dad @tenboobs]

I think its funny when im texting or messaging someone and then i stop to go jerk off bc its like my little secret. If only they knew what i was doing 🤭

[dad @tenboobs]

There is nothing more difficult and more time consuming than choosing the perfect font

[dad @tenboobs]

Who up stuffing they stockings

[Kaitlyn Adams @Kait2lyn]

Costco CEO who loses his shit at even the suggestion of raising the hot dog price is the only one safe

[dad @tenboobs]

"face plant" as a brand name for a comestic line would eat

[dad @tenboobs]

Hoping in 2025 we can start appropriating british slang into the american lexicon. Like, “soz”

[dad @tenboobs]

I cannot help that my thoughts are composed of bits and blurbs. I have to release them into the ether or i will begin to wither away

[dad @tenboobs]

Once i achieve muscle mommy status its over for u hoes

[dad @tenboobs]

Sickos fr. And i’ll call you a sicko to your face

[dad @tenboobs]

Does stuffing serve a functional purpose

[dad @tenboobs]

Ppl who swap things out with greek yogurt make me want to end my life

[dad @tenboobs]

God minimalism is so lame

[dad @tenboobs]

@hourIyhoroscope Then why make everyone i love and cherish in my life a sag hmmm???!