Jazzica

apologetically myself ~ professional dilly-dallier ~ easily entertained but not easily impressed

[nathaniel @nathanielro]

Squidward was in his 40s in 1999 meaning he had his prime years during the AIDS crisis. It’s likely he spent a large portion of his life closeted or self-loathing. It makes sense he would resent SpongeBob’s carefree lifestyle. SpongeBob is everything Squidward couldn't be

[Jazzica @textistential]

- trailing cars for sport until the driver fears for her life…
- creating Gmail accounts for infants who have yet to even be born…

yes; these are just two of numerous examples of how random my friends and I were in high school 😍😂

[Julie Greiner @JulieAbridged]

on a google meet where I can tell almost everyone but me owns a home

[Cuck Liddell @c0ck_l3snar]

a guy ripped off my socks before we had sex and i had to stop him and tell him I needed those

[brecht apologist @madison_tayt]

watching everyone talk about my salary range like it’s the most disgusting and abject poverty they could imagine

[Jazzica @textistential]

@danadonnelly it makes me sad that every other posts of yours for years has been about how much this man hates you 😭

[Mike 📺 @michaelcollado]

Coworker and I are in the same Google Doc at 10:22pm

[Jazzica @textistential]

@gracecamille_ the real lovers see that your facial expressions and body language are embodying only that of two people with incredible banter and intellectual chemistry

[Brunette @mimizima_]

Being at work is like being in a horror movie where everyone loves AI

[m ✰ @mar3uss]

I know being in a class with Chappell was probably rough because wasn’t shit funny to her

[Meggy @igetsoinspired]

I can tell that it’s causing discomfort when I refuse to look at my phone idly in public spaces. But I’m trying to bring back just looking around

[Jazzica @textistential]

@femaleuncle thought u meant the burger bc of my own traumatic past of eating a lot of Burger King when I had an in-person office job :—(

[Jazzica @textistential]

I love how when you pay for dinner on your credit card but have someone Venmo you $$ that you deposit to your checking acct, you basically make a profit 🤩

[Jazzica @textistential]

Grimes is literally like if FKA Twigs were white sorry to say

[Jazzica @textistential]

@Jessi_Rihanna Jeff Besos <3

[Jazzica @textistential]

white ppl be like “sorry I’m actually spending Valentine’s Day with my parents this year bc the dog almost died last month”

[Jazzica @textistential]

@Keefler_Elf Disc for short. Cord, even

[Jazzica @textistential]

@tyler02020202 I can’t explain it but all of this actually seems really healthy for u specifically