egregious blob

I do stuff.

[egregious blob @thamarella]

@cubbieberry just wanted to say TYSM for speaking at the storytelling workshop this morning - this was my first dip of the toes back into the writing community and your voice was incredibly validating and inspiring for this fellow qbipoc woman with invisible diabilities ❤️🙏❤️

[egregious blob @thamarella]

obligatory "back from hiatus/oblivion/hermitude* acknowledgment post

[egregious blob @thamarella]

@stanzipotenza you should know this tweet singlehandedly got me back into this show after six years cause I had to figure out who you meant (okay this and Kate Bush, so you're in rarefied company 😘)

[egregious blob @thamarella]

@vfiaca @BlizzardCS also getting this issue, had been playing fine on my phone for a few days, now logging in just takes me back to saying it can't connect to https://t.co/LZYS2CfiwV, and I can't find any indication there's a server outage

[egregious blob @thamarella]

@AnandWrites New drinking game: take a shot every time he mispronounces "civic" as "cervic"

[Yuri Lowenthal 🇵🇸 🇺🇦 #ceasefirenow @YuriLowenthal]

Someone just mistyped “grocery store clerks” as “grocery store clerics” and I don’t think anything’s ever been truer at this moment in time.

[Laurie Penny @PennyRed]

Quarantine day 6, and we’re all: -quietly reading improving books
-doing crafts with the three people we’re allowed to see till summer
-wondering if a single cough means imminent death
-thinking almost constantly about sex.
I suddenly understand Jane Austen novels much better.

[Wesley Chu @wes_chu]

Funny thing about this tweet. Here's a fun tidbit. For a period of approximately 30 years from the 1950s to 1980, hurricanes were only named after women.

Because, well, you can come to your own conclusion.

[Bo Bolander @BBolander]

me: jesus, all i have in the cupboard is two tins of tuna fish, an expired box of jello, and egg noodles

1950's cookbook author's ghost, calling from hell: well well well, not so high and mighty now, are we?

[Katie Mack @AstroKatie]

[Cake voice]

We’re KEEPING our DISTANCE
We’re all QUARANTINED
We stay alone (ALL ALONE), for our friends in their time of NEED

[Sam Sykes @SamSykesSwears]

this one is great

[Miranda Keeling @MirandaKeeling]

Man 1 walking behind me in Tottenham: Feels end of days.
Man 2: Yes.
Man 1: So I might as well tell you.
Man 2: What?
Man 1: (inhales) That I love you.
Long pause.
Man 1: You don’t feel the same.
Man 2: Of course I do you silly sausage I’m just trying not to cry.

[Guadalupe González Overall @mariainnyc]

This viral tweet claims photos were taken in Venice when in actuality these are photos from Burano, Italy.

According to people replying to the tweet, these canals usually have swans and fishes.

Screenshots below this tweet

[Argon Dreamcast Evangelion @synthandlasers]

People: "I want 2020 to be like the roarin' twenties!"

Earth: "Alright, infectious disease is spreading."

People: "No, not like that."

Earth: "The US stock market is tanking."

People: "Wait..."

Earth: "LMAO Bars can't be open anymore."

[Sensei Jax @JaxBladeFitness]

So I was watching those Beyond Belief Fact or Fiction videos and someone in the comments mentioned how if you put it at .5 speed he sounds like a depressed drunk on the sidewalk trying to get your attention, & so I did, and I've been wheezing badly at this for the last 7 minutes

[Brit @brit_ritchey]

If current events are getting you down, here’s a squishy lamb face to brighten your day.
#MrShoutypants

[Atypical Engineer @FatuousTwaddle]

@spindlypete @NeolithicSheep

[Brianna Whitrock (Shrum) @BriannaShrum]

someday everyone will be able to immediately pick out all the millennial gravestones because everyone else's will be like "loving husband, wings of angels" and ours will be like
"thank fuck"
"a very good boi"
"1995-2064. nice."
"she died doing what she loved: being murdered"

[SparkNotes @SparkNotes]

JOB HUNTING
- stressful
- frustrating
- a job in itself

TAKING CAREER ADVICE FROM THREE WITCHES ON THE HEATH
- ominous and cool
- guaranteed results
- you don't even have to do anything besides slay duncan and frame the servants. anyway your wife can help with that