bryon noem's big naturals

every time i tell people i'm a poet i shoot myself in the social foot

[ᴅᴏᴏᴍᴇɴɪᴄ @dinosaur_info]

however chill or not chill I seem now, I was way way more strict as a kid. I was in kindergarten avoiding kids who said “libary” because I thought they were incurably stupid

[Jack @GayLaVie]

IF YOU’RE IN LINE TO EAT THE PAINT CHIPS FLAKING OFF THE LINCOLN MEMORIAL REFLECTING POOL, STAY IN LINE

[ᶜᵒᵘʳᵗ @tropicaIghost]

you should always be texting your best friend like you’re in a situationship that’s going to suddenly end in 24 hours

[Wopavelli @TheWopObama]

In American slang we often refer to money as “benjamins” this is a subtle reference to Benjamin Netanyahu, an American folk figure who takes all of our money

[Air @ayoair]

If the Knicks win tonight the city will do the opposite of explode and instead the twin towers will rise from beneath the ground and Tupac will be at the parade

[perfect angel @girl__virus]

i'm california sober which means i smoke weed every day, i drink at parties and i also do cocaine when it's offered to me at parties

[femiiiiii. @femiiiszn]

i hope the next global trend will be empathy and critical thinking.

[turnip 🃏 @HaoTurnip]

Not a single corporate rainbow pfp they straight don't gaf anymore LMAO

[Normal Island News @NormalIslandNws]

Huge concern in New York that Zohran Mamdani is spending $122 million on schools and hiring 1,000 school teachers when that money could be buying bombs for Israel

[Tony Statovci @tonystatovci]

from my best friend in the whole entire world btw 😭😭😭

[UwUTangClan @Executivejeff1]

I'm pushing on pull doors in buildings you've never heard of

[m @skitzocat]

the dead horse is beating me

[soup🍓 @thrluv]

i’m gonna start saying “not all men” when someone says something positive about a man

[Bummer T. Vibes, Esq @VibesBummer]

Before google maps you just had a buddy in another car who said “follow me” then proceeded to run a late yellow at the next intersection.

[🆗 @JJJ4Y0_O]

white ppl think this shit gon be the hunger games man u are going to be eating catfood in the dark while your brain deteriorates from asphyxiation due to the atmosphere becoming unbreathable

[#1 computer user @inherentvibes]

being nostalgic for 2016 is so funny because at the time there were so many memes about it being literally the worst year ever

[Taco Bella @bellathetaco]

No yeah i’m sure your boyfriend who booked a 3:45 pm dinner reservation for Valentine’s day at Earls is a great guy

[brecht apologist @madison_tayt]

RIP to all the gold girls who are getting silver jewelry tomorrow and to all the silver girls who are getting gold jewelry tomorrow and to aaaaall the girls who are getting ugly ass heart shaped jewelry tomorrow!
hope you break up with your boyfriends 🩷🩷🩷

[bee @sunfIowerellie]

gay people on twitter when they go to a gay club and see people doing cocaine instead of discussing whether bi women can use the butch/femme labels

[WHAM @WhamSteppa]

where can i get grenades im mad as fuck