M. Chad Durham

Internet & Automation Cowboy

[M. Chad Durham @theRratedBull]

I try and I try and I try to have a relationship with my GPS but she is such a cold recalculating bitch.

[M. Chad Durham @theRratedBull]

Whenever I get dirty looks for not wearing a mask I just want to shout, "Yes, I am fully vaccinated and yes I have had Covid twice! But good luck!"

[M. Chad Durham @theRratedBull]

Let me explain "Squid Game" for you: It's basically the Korean version of the "Dave Ramsey Show."

[M. Chad Durham @theRratedBull]

Yes, he's a big time rock star now, but I remember him as the guy who dropped a pass I threw to him when he was 15-yards behind the nearest defender our senior year of high school that would have won the game.

[M. Chad Durham @theRratedBull]

Nephew makes the smart choice.

[Matthew Walters @_MatthewWalters]

I feel absolutely blessed and thrilled to announce that I will continue my academic and athletic career at Cornell University. I want to thank God, my family, my friends, and my coaches for all their support. Go Big Red!! @CornellBaseball @GHSPirateBSBL @arlingtonas1988

[Matthew Walters @_MatthewWalters]

What a great last tournament with these guys! I appreciate the award and the teammates and coaches that made it possible. @arlingtonas1988

[M. Chad Durham @theRratedBull]

My nephew seems to do it all.

[Matthew Walters @_MatthewWalters]

It was awesome to catch @luke_boyers5 ‘s first college home run!! More than happy to give it back!
@TCU_Baseball

[Matthew Walters @_MatthewWalters]

Huge win last night over Grapevine for the first game of the playoffs!! Glad I could help out by going 3-3 with this HR and 3 SBs. Excited to get out there again tonight! @GHSPirateBSBL @arlingtonas1988 @Hootem11 @CULionsBaseball @BigGreenBasebal @BrownU_Baseball @PeppBaseball

[Matthew Walters @_MatthewWalters]

Another great weekend for the team! Nice to finish off tournament season going 4-1 against some ranked teams! Glad I could help out yesterday with this grand slam! 💣 @GHSPirateBSBL @arlingtonas1988 @CULionsBaseball @BigGreenBasebal @PeppBaseball @RiceBaseball @StanfordBSB

[M. Chad Durham @theRratedBull]

I've lived long enough to see Hootie go country and Garth Brooks turn Commie.

[M. Chad Durham @theRratedBull]

It's not that I can't empathize; it's that I just don't care.

[M. Chad Durham @theRratedBull]

I went on a journey of self-discovery once and got totally lost.

[M. Chad Durham @theRratedBull]

I know I'm not everybody's cup of tea. I am a Texan, after all. It's okay if I'm your huge gallon jug of sweet tea.

[M. Chad Durham @theRratedBull]

I can't tell you what I just did, but if you're reading this, that means it was a success and I saved all mankind. Again. You're welcome.

[M. Chad Durham @theRratedBull]

The only things that are truly terrifying in this world are talking toys.

[M. Chad Durham @theRratedBull]

Kill 'em with kindness then bury them in dirt. That's my motto.

[M. Chad Durham @theRratedBull]

My version of creative accounting is leaving a dollar bill inside my jacket pocket to find next fall.

[M. Chad Durham @theRratedBull]

Perhaps no other Christmas gift said 2020 like this one that came in my stocking.

[M. Chad Durham @theRratedBull]

@dateline_keith Grandma got runover by a reindeer walking home on Christmas eve but was it an accident or something sinister? What does Grandpa believe? And, later, one reindeer finally speaks out about what really happened that foggy Christmas Eve. When "Dateline" continues.

[M. Chad Durham @theRratedBull]

I just hope The Mandalorian remembered to put the new cover sheets on those TPS Reports.
This is the way.

[M. Chad Durham @theRratedBull]

Santa is jolly because he always has 3 Ho's on the side.