Avery Hunter

[Avery Hunter @theaveryhunter]

This knife reminds me of the cartoon part of The Incredible’s movie.

[Avery Hunter @theaveryhunter]

They both have the, ‘I sucked a lemon face’ and you know it.

[Avery Hunter @theaveryhunter]

I gotta go to Barnes and Noble, that will work out my constipation.

[Avery Hunter @theaveryhunter]

When a baby hits 1 year old… I don’t like them any more.

[Avery Hunter @theaveryhunter]

Let’s be honest… I’m the man in the relationship. He’s gonna have to take my last name.

[Avery Hunter @theaveryhunter]

Something in his face is giving gorilla.

[Avery Hunter @theaveryhunter]

I throw up a lot… I can’t help it.

[Avery Hunter @theaveryhunter]

After watching that video for science… I no longer feel like Global Warming is a bad thing.

[Avery Hunter @theaveryhunter]

She’s way too frail and skinny… somebody needs to give that girl a hot dog.

[Avery Hunter @theaveryhunter]

That guy looks like he would make a GREAT pizza.

[Avery Hunter @theaveryhunter]

I will get down to some Spanish music.

[Avery Hunter @theaveryhunter]

You’re so good with old people and babies. That’s your gift.

[Avery Hunter @theaveryhunter]

Grammy is really famous for her grapes.

[Avery Hunter @theaveryhunter]

Well. Once a pedophile, always a pedophile… that’s what I always say.

[Avery Hunter @theaveryhunter]

She’s all small, frail, and tired… like a bird.

[Avery Hunter @theaveryhunter]

Malibu?! That’s literally where Barbie lives.

[Avery Hunter @theaveryhunter]

They seem like a ketchup and ranch kinda people.

[Avery Hunter @theaveryhunter]

Me: We’re losing.
Them: No. It’s tied.
Me: Same thing. If you’re not winning, you’re losing.

[Avery Hunter @theaveryhunter]

If Men In Black has taught me anything… it’s that, that’s a spaceship.

(Talking about the space needle)

[Avery Hunter @theaveryhunter]

When you finally get to wear high heels and complain about how much your feet hurt, you’ve officially grown up.