Jake Hopkins

[Jake Hopkins @thebigfastjake]

$100 for shoes? Heck no.

$5,000 for wheels? (my truck has wheels) Dude, these are normally $5,200 so I’d be losing money NOT buying them.

[Jake Hopkins @thebigfastjake]

Got told I was “a little slow” so many times as a kid, I built a 900hp Cummins to go fast💨💨

Diagnose that, Dr. Buttmunch.

[Jake Hopkins @thebigfastjake]

What happened to HIDING from the cops when it’s time to race/do hoodrat stuff?

Back in my day, we all knew about “the spot” 💨

[Jake Hopkins @thebigfastjake]

Every time I mention a fast truck/car online, someone brings up an egg-shaped EV that’s “technically” faster.

Sit down, nerd. I like my check engine lights and oil leaks, thank you.

[Jake Hopkins @thebigfastjake]

Idk who needs to hear this, but with enough nitrous, ANYTHING can be a race car.

At least for a few seconds 💣

[Jake Hopkins @thebigfastjake]

If you bump in at a red light, best believe I’m boosted launching like I got money for a new engine.

I’ll yeet a piston to Pluto before I get gapped by Debby’s minivan ☄️

[Jake Hopkins @thebigfastjake]

Yo Cummins, you can stop mailing out those emissions recall notices. We, uhh, fixed it ourselves 😬

Sincerely, all of us Cummins owners.

[Jake Hopkins @thebigfastjake]

The founding fathers didn’t donkey punch the British back to England so that you could drive a Hyundai.

It’s your birthright to build an absolute piss-missile because you CAN 🇺🇸

[Jake Hopkins @thebigfastjake]

The founding fathers didn���t donkey punch the British back to England so that you could drive a Hyundai.

[Jake Hopkins @thebigfastjake]

Was filling up my truck, and when I pulled the nozzle out, like 5 drops of fuel hit the ground.

Absolute waste of $20.

[Jake Hopkins @thebigfastjake]

Idk how many times I hit my head as a kid, but it was enough to replace math and spelling with the ability to identify engines based on the exhaust note.

Concussion? More like cubic inches.

[Jake Hopkins @thebigfastjake]

These new fangled in-car surveillance systems should also shut down drivers who merge onto the interstate at 40mph.

Y’all ain’t going anywhere anyway.

[Jake Hopkins @thebigfastjake]

“Did you know your check engine light’s on?”

Brother, with as much stuff as I’ve cut off and bolted on this truck, I’m surprised the instrument cluster still works.

[Jake Hopkins @thebigfastjake]

No matter how much a dude spends on trucks/bikes/cars, that’s MAYBE 20% of what he wants to spend.

Y’all don’t even realize the stupid stuff we HAVEN’T bought.

[Jake Hopkins @thebigfastjake]

Tracking how much a project vehicle has cost you is like counting your beers when you’re at a BBQ.

Doing that math is only gonna make your day worse.

[Jake Hopkins @thebigfastjake]

Ever see a mint-condition old truck out in the wild? No mods, no restoration, just a flawless time capsule parked at Walmart like it’s 1992 again.

To me, that’s more impressive than ANY exotic car.

[Jake Hopkins @thebigfastjake]

Forget 0-60 times, I wanna know how fast I can go 110-55. You read that right.

I call it the “oh s***, that looks like a state trooper test”.

[Jake Hopkins @thebigfastjake]

Idk who needs to hear this, but this is how speed limits work:

School zones + neighborhoods = 5 under
20-45mph limit = Do 5-10 over
55mph limit = Do 10-15 over
65+mph limit = Send it

[Jake Hopkins @thebigfastjake]

Ladies, if your man has a project truck, he is LOYAL.

He’s $35,000 into a truck with the KBB of a ham sammich. Quitting ain’t in his vocabulary.

[Jake Hopkins @thebigfastjake]

People who think loud exhausts are offensive are the same people who think ketchup is spicy.

Life is short, Karen. Live a little.