Lauren Stephens

[Lauren Stephens @thehoot]

http://t.co/XlmI44xyKj I gave love a bad name. I called it Harold.

[Lauren Stephens @thehoot]

http://t.co/SpXWQahes9 I think that time will eventually show that Vanilli was by far the more talented of the two.

[Lauren Stephens @thehoot]

The weirder Rihanna's tattoos get the less I blame Chris Brown. http://t.co/e4NIUiffvP

[Lauren Stephens @thehoot]

http://t.co/gvGofExkqB Can anyone help me load Angry Birds on my PalmPilot? If so hit me up on my pager...

[Lauren Stephens @thehoot]

I call my car 'The Forest Whitaker' because the left light barely works. http://t.co/TQyod27vRO

[Lauren Stephens @thehoot]

http://t.co/zKysXRbLDG As if being a surgeon wasn't enough you're a general too?

[Lauren Stephens @thehoot]

http://t.co/Xb1FnnzsLa Why haven't they installed a mirror on cars that only covers your blind spot?

[Lauren Stephens @thehoot]

http://t.co/6AvDvmnE9o I can't wait until I'm 69. It's going to be hilarious.

[Lauren Stephens @thehoot]

http://t.co/eCjcTAJgbI Is that a banana in your pocket or have you been lying about your name being Amy?

[Lauren Stephens @thehoot]

http://t.co/JUFmNwTWDz Rubbing my ass on these documents because the boss's email says to "cheek his paperwork".

[Lauren Stephens @thehoot]

"It's not you, it's me. " - twins looking at family photos http://t.co/3v4pojnZvo

[Lauren Stephens @thehoot]

I bet when you go to hell they make you wear your hair like you did in 5th grade http://t.co/PF7xiiZhwG

[Lauren Stephens @thehoot]

http://t.co/XYcPPkbld5 Deleting your Facebook is the new regaining your dignity.

[Lauren Stephens @thehoot]

"I liked small butts. I was lying." - Sir Mix-A-Lot's teary deathbed confession http://t.co/5WhxeDjT3b

[Lauren Stephens @thehoot]

Do hipster chicks wear sweatpants that say "DRY" on the butt? http://t.co/N5rZbQcbqu

[Lauren Stephens @thehoot]

http://t.co/ai6hdiOY That awkward moment when the operator asks you to read back the confirmation number.

[Lauren Stephens @thehoot]

http://t.co/yimR3BBj i never dreamed that little pictures on a screen would feel like friends... yet here i am.

[Lauren Stephens @thehoot]

http://t.co/gqbHbSki My only real accomplishment in life is knowing all the words to Coolio's "gangsta's paradise".

[Lauren Stephens @thehoot]

http://t.co/h0N2HRcL I used to drink beer in my underwear but now I use a glass.

[Lauren Stephens @thehoot]

Think Youll Never Lose Those Excess Pounds? Try These Simple Fixes Before You Give Up! http://t.co/MptoLpoT