The Hound

Tweets from a dog's life.

[The Hound @TheHound_]

I iz a happy boy. #smiles #beach #happydog

[The Hound @TheHound_]

Check out ma ASS #hot #fluffy #youknowit

[The Hound @TheHound_]

HAPPY BURFDAY TO ME! Today I am three. Or twenty one. Who cares, I have a new monkey and chewed a leg off already.

[The Hound @TheHound_]

@StitchsMaster I can post you some ear knotz

[The Hound @TheHound_]

Today I has eaten nice little blue fings called RAT POYZUN 🐀

Mummy took me to a v v v expensive vet who made me upchuck blue shit EVRYWUR 🤮

And now I has got a honky octopus called Nuggetz to make it all better. I shall do this again next week.

[The Hound @TheHound_]

I am allergic to humans like dis but dey seem to keep comin in ma pub. Does anyone else fink I should bark YOU DERE SIT STILL AN DO AS I SAY OR I WILL RIP YOUR FACE OFF unless you gimme a crisp in which case I LURV U

[Jen k 🇬🇧🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 @Jenny_1884]

I am allergic to Dogs & Cats so am not very happy they are allowed now in Pubs, Coffee Shops & Restaurants

Does anyone else think Dogs should not be allowed indoors?

[The Hound @TheHound_]

@SaveStBernards @fleetstreetfox I KNOW OCTY PUSS IS MAZIN

[The Hound @TheHound_]

@fleetstreetfox SNOOOOOOOOOT

[The Hound @TheHound_]

Sigh. Mummy insisting on sleepin’ in mah bed again. She takes up so much room, easily more than one eighth of the mattress. Ah am soooo tolerant.

[The Hound @TheHound_]

Monday night vibezzz

[The Hound @TheHound_]

Apparently £300 to be told I ate some cotton wool means I have to sleep in the kitchen.

Cotton wool is EVIL. It is probably from a squiwwel or simlar.

[The Hound @TheHound_]

I have eaten a fing. I am at the vet. My mummy says this is going to be expensive. #prayforharry

[The Hound @TheHound_]

I have been sick. There was no fing. Mummy is cross. I cannot tell her fing was a bit of cotton wool that was ickle bit ticklish *cough cough cough*

#mummyimdyingface

[The Hound @TheHound_]

@KayBurley Has he eaten a fing too?

[The Hound @TheHound_]

@SmallAperture @fleetstreetfox *pants and looks pathetic*

[The Hound @TheHound_]

Ok groomers are NO FUN but I all FLUFF NOW

*preens*

[The Hound @TheHound_]

What’s a ‘groomer’?

[The Hound @TheHound_]

Is my burfday I got a honky moo cow i luvs her HONK HONK HONK HONK

[The Hound @TheHound_]

BARF PLEEEEEEASE.

[The Hound @TheHound_]

Just ate a teabag. ‘Sgud.