Miles Lloyd

I'm a comedian. Apparently. Go to my website! It's awesome! (Spoiler alert: It's just a blog.)

[Miles Lloyd @themileslloyd]

@Carrie_Smatic This was already the funniest film ever made and this makes it an 11/10

[Miles Lloyd @themileslloyd]

@jayforeman Why?

[Miles Lloyd @themileslloyd]

@jayforeman We should get a kickstarter going to bring the bridge back

[Miles Lloyd @themileslloyd]

There's two Dutch girls staying in my flat for the month and what a fun language they have! It's like having the Sims playing in the backgroud. All the time. It's absolute nonsense.

[Miles Lloyd @themileslloyd]

@ArfurSmith Just take a bit off the top.

[Miles Lloyd @themileslloyd]

What's happening? I'll tell you what's happening; I've only gone and written the feel-good hit of the summer. https://t.co/Nd6KEDtnP5
#musicvideo #comedy #icanthashtag

[Miles Lloyd @themileslloyd]

@jayforeman Nice! This makes me feel way better about the disgusting weather I've had to suffer through all this year over here.

[Hannah Maryse @hannah_maryse]

The Noel Clarke thing brings back some awful memories. Men like him can abuse with impunity in this industry because there is an endless supply of people trying to get thier break. Speaking up just means to you won't be hired next time.

[Miles Lloyd @themileslloyd]

Do you ever listen to a Cure album for the 14th time this week and think "I should really listen to more Cure"?

I do.

[Miles Lloyd @themileslloyd]

@Hannah_Maryse I still haven't seen paddington 2 but Citizen Kane is literally the worst film I've ever seen. Paddington is one of my favourite films ever though

[Miles Lloyd @themileslloyd]

Today my bedroom smells like playing Zelda on the n64 in my father's house and it's a very weird way to remember anything.

[Miles Lloyd @themileslloyd]

When the queen dies I've got dibs on all the swans.

[Miles Lloyd @themileslloyd]

@Hannah_Maryse They're not even trying to be discrete about it. They fucking suck.

[Miles Lloyd @themileslloyd]

@Noizey_Man I'll take 2!

[Miles Lloyd @themileslloyd]

10 Years for Protesting is Perfectly Fair or; My Tips for The British https://t.co/gou2OZOajw

[Miles Lloyd @themileslloyd]

The Absolute Worst Thing About German People. https://t.co/rOzlpIkZRK

[Miles Lloyd @themileslloyd]

Netflix Sucks or; Horses Are The Worst Fucking People https://t.co/zs7iliwCVZ

[Miles Lloyd @themileslloyd]

@Noizey_Man What? This sounds like the pergw t pet.

[Miles Lloyd @themileslloyd]

NASA have landed another rover on Mars and I can hardly fit my fist in my mouth anymore. I'm almost 35.

[Miles Lloyd @themileslloyd]

@mikesheer The best part is on I think page 278? Where he mentions laughing for the first and only time. The sad bastard.

[Miles Lloyd @themileslloyd]

So far today I've been listening to The Cure for 5 hours and it's been great. I'm going to aim for a full 10.