themompro

[themompro @themompro]

All you men walking around thinking you are #godsgifttowomen obviously have never heard of #dryshampoo.

[themompro @themompro]

I’m renaming my lower stomach pouch to my c-section souvenir. Who’s with me?! #momlife

[themompro @themompro]

Watching #NKOTBonGMA. I’m laughing at how they all look like PTA dads or like they’re at a fraternity reunion party now. 🤣 #notmadatit #stillhot @NKOTB

[themompro @themompro]

Y’all worried about #Momo while my kids are scared of Mama.

[themompro @themompro]

Being a mom is a lot like being a prison warden. Separate, contain, feed, & clothe them. Keep them from fighting & making a mess at lunch. Give them time in the yard. Get them to be quiet & sleep in their cells. Prepare them for release into the world. Tell me I’m wrong. #momlife

[themompro @themompro]

My favorite part of parenting with my husband is joining forces to tease our kids. #nothingmean #justsillystuff #theyloveit

[themompro @themompro]

Teaching the difference to a five year old between to, two, too, and tutu.

Dear creators of the English language,
Go home. You’re drunk. #teaching #english #readingisfun #readingisdifficult

[themompro @themompro]

Hubs: “What is the capital of Tennessee?”
5 year old: “T”

The kid ain’t wrong.

#lookslikedaddy #actslikemama

[themompro @themompro]

I feel like I should send Alexa an apology letter on my five year old’s behalf. #pooralexa

[themompro @themompro]

“Son, I’m going to the restroom. I’ll be right back, ok?”
“Ok.”

Not even a minute later.

“MAMAAAAAA! WHERE ARE YOU?! MAMAAAAA!!!!”

🤦���‍♀️
#momlife #yallknow

[themompro @themompro]

The average American household has approximately 47 remote controls. The average American mom can’t find the one that actually works. 🤯 #orisitjustme?

[themompro @themompro]

If Mark and @CaryDeuber ever divorce, I will lose all hope for every relationship ever. #RHOD

[themompro @themompro]

The sound of jack saying “beck” the moment he died was actually his ghost. And at some point, the show will come back around and replay how his ghost protected all of them through their lives and replays former episodes with his ghost present. #thisisustheory 🤯

[ThisIsUsFanCrew @ThisIsUsFanCrew]

Everything’s gonna be fine, just BREATHE. #ThisIsUs⁠ ⁠ #JustBreathe @NBCThisisUs

[jess @jessicakmichel]

I leaned more about the draft from 3 minutes of #ThisIsUs than I did in 14 years of school. Crazy.

[EntrePooNigga @TheMelExp]

MAAAAAAAAN so y’all mean to tell me Jack survived a whole ass war but a CROCKPOT took him out. Now I’m mad #ThisIsUs

[themompro @themompro]

I used to mutter under my breath about my parents. Now, I do it about my kids. #fullcircle

[themompro @themompro]

I forgot how much teething sucks... 😩

[themompro @themompro]

Be honest. Sweet and sour chicken is just chicken nuggets for adults. #truth #chinesefordinner

[themompro @themompro]

When your child screams during #timeout and you wonder if you’re destined for an episode of #DrPhil... #parenting