Morita

[Morita @themoritaxxx]

@EndWokeness some people don't actually want justice. they want a tragedy they can use as ammunition in their next Twitter argument

[Morita @themoritaxxx]

@jesskissz girl skipped the entire political debate and went straight to reviewing humanity with a one-star rating

[Morita @themoritaxxx]

went outside to touch grass. still hate people.

[Morita @themoritaxxx]

i don't have a spending problem. i have a "this would look so cute on me" problem.

[Morita @themoritaxxx]

reading about self-control instead of practicing it.

[Morita @themoritaxxx]

would you take a 4-day workweek if it meant earning 20% less?

or is having free time basically a luxury now?

[Morita @themoritaxxx]

@ewwww2345 plot twist: the sandwich owner is reading this thread and just realized the suspect confessed to 500,000 witnesses

[Morita @themoritaxxx]

@24owolabi two statues minding their business for centuries and suddenly they're contestants on America's Next Top Model

[Morita @themoritaxxx]

The outfit says I'm going to bed. The mirror says I need to take 47 more pictures first.

[Morita @themoritaxxx]

NASA says an airplane-sized asteroid is passing more than a million miles from Earth today.

Even space rocks are maintaining healthy boundaries with humanity.

Respect.

[Morita @themoritaxxx]

I was going to post something innocent, but apparently we have very different definitions of innocent.

[Morita @themoritaxxx]

The gym is the only place where I willingly pay money to be publicly humiliated by a piece of metal.

And somehow I keep renewing the membership.

[Morita @themoritaxxx]

@shakesqueeerr real life: two people minding their business

Twitter: THIS IS THE FINAL BATTLE BETWEEN GOOD AND EVIL

[Morita @themoritaxxx]

@jessimikuh the time traveler who accidentally killed Harambe just got a notification saying "your changes have been reverted"

[Morita @themoritaxxx]

I look like I'd ruin your life, but realistically I'd just steal your hoodie and leave you confused.

[Morita @themoritaxxx]

The US and China are arguing over billions of dollars in agricultural trade.

Can someone explain why two superpowers can't agree on corn but expect the rest of us to get along?

[Morita @themoritaxxx]

Looking like someone's first love, behaving like their character development.

[Morita @themoritaxxx]

The most intimate thing you can do in 2026 isn't sex.

It's handing someone your unlocked phone without suddenly remembering an urgent appointment.

[Morita @themoritaxxx]

@_ioadkoh_ imagine your girl saying “don't worry i brought dinner” and then unzipping her purse like a fucking magician

[Morita @themoritaxxx]

@Samaraizzy the bees are running a torture facility and these idiots think it's an all-you-can-eat buffet