Richard Ball

Moderate or good, occasionally poor.
Recovering sysadmin.
They/Them

[Richard Ball @thethreeharrys]

@SP_EnergyPeople Your radio adverts brag about bringing down call times, but you go to incredible lengths to hide your phone number, and then when you call it you're told to chat online.

[Richard Ball @thethreeharrys]

@ScottishPower you changed my meters late on Christmas eve and wiped £100 off my gas credit. Am I getting that back or an I paying for a shareholders cufflinks?

[Richard Ball @thethreeharrys]

Oh, and if you send cocaine using a despatch service, you are putting our driver's at enormous risk. That's why we pretend to lose it for several hours and ask you what the consignment was, to see if it's covered by our standard liability cover

[Richard Ball @thethreeharrys]

Popping back to twitter to say happy "spend the next few days being shouted at trying to deliver urgent corporate gifts to people who are off work for the next three weeks" to all who celebrate

[Richard Ball @thethreeharrys]

@RossMc11 I wonder if I'm out of the industry long enough to tell the fish story, the G8 summit story, or spill the beans on News International.

[Richard Ball @thethreeharrys]

@RossMc11 My first ever delivery, aged 11, was a bottle of whisky. We had delivered two to a client, and third member of the team was so incensed at not getting one he smashed them. I had to go there on foot, on Christmas eve, to deliver three replacements.

[Richard Ball @thethreeharrys]

@RossMc11 Another favourite

"How big is the parcel"
"About the size of a dog".

Reader, it was not a dog.

[Richard Ball @thethreeharrys]

@RossMc11 PLEASE wrap them properly and address them. I remember being told all to clearly that we could "post if not in". The gifts were watermelons.

[Richard Ball @thethreeharrys]

@RossMc11 "will fit on a push bike" No. A pot of tea. That's a teapot WITH HOT TEA IN IT, will not go in a couriers bag.

[Richard Ball @thethreeharrys]

Phone geeks, would I get an old S23 or stump up for an S24, or go mad and get a flip 6 when my current flip dies?

[Richard Ball @thethreeharrys]

Who can I moan at about the death of local radio?

[Richard Ball @thethreeharrys]

Trying to start on the other place, but in terms of who I follow I'm seeing a big gender bias.

[Richard Ball @thethreeharrys]

@HylandIan Since we started expecting "free delivery" and behemoths like Amazon pushed the rate they were prepared to pay down, meaning the driver, who has to pay all their own costs, gets maybe 50p a drop, and so has to do over 250 deliveries a day to make less than minimum wage

[Richard Ball @thethreeharrys]

@caitlinmoran If Oldman gets it please for the love of god let him go full Jackson Lamb. "Trying to explain magic to you is like trying to explain Norway to a dog".

[Richard Ball @thethreeharrys]

@stellacreasy @TerrysOrangePI The mint one is a crime, but fun fact, the chocolate orange started life as a chocolate apple

[Richard Ball @thethreeharrys]

Presenting MOTD should be like jury service now @GaryLineker is hanging up his spurs, you get called up at random for two weeks.

[Richard Ball @thethreeharrys]

@watsoncomedian Can't some clever techbro build us a tool to export our follow lists from eX to another platform?

[Richard Ball @thethreeharrys]

Commercial radio gives a real sense of how busy you must be if you sound a bit like Rob Brydon.

[Richard Ball @thethreeharrys]

Clothes twitter, what do you call those tops with hems and collars that look as though you're wearing a blouse underneath?

[Richard Ball @thethreeharrys]

@NotHaryan @faizashaheen That's not what that word means.