Tim Guan

Human bean • go bears

[Nasdaq Exchange @NasdaqExchange]

We are getting ready to welcome @Redfin to our family of the world's most innovative companies! #RedfinIPO $RDFN

[Tim Guan @thetimguan]

@katyperry @CalvinHarris I ain't afraid to catch no fish

[Cooper Professional Education @cooper]

We're excited to announce that Cooper SF has a beautiful new home! Join us for our grand opening shindig 2/22: https://t.co/I6oH82VsVo

[Tim Guan @thetimguan]

@HomemadeLevity Thanks for the shout out!

[Tim Guan @thetimguan]

Have I solved the avocado problem? Only one way to find out: https://t.co/9ys0u7Omlg

[Tim Guan @thetimguan]

I've walked past this monument for 3 years without noticing... should've read the plaque. Thanks @romanmars #99pi

[Bernie Sanders @BernieSanders]

Tom Hanks. Finally. Somebody who makes some sense. #GOPDebate #DebateWithBernie

[The Onion @TheOnion]

Trump Delivers Anecdote About Small Business Owner Who Isn’t Half The Man He Is http://t.co/vjDB6C6JdP #GOPDebate

[Bernie Sanders @BernieSanders]

Will the Republicans tell us why they reject the near-unanimous scientific opinion that climate change is real and caused by human activity?

[Tim Guan @thetimguan]

Sunshowers are the weirdest.

[Tim Guan @thetimguan]

"Here's a picture of a class of Berkeley students from the 1950s in their ties and their skirts and their white faces."

[Tim Guan @thetimguan]

"I feel like everyone's deodorant has worn off"

[Tim Guan @thetimguan]

"I'll never forget that baguette. It was like stone."

[Tim Guan @thetimguan]

"Body is my third language."

[Tim Guan @thetimguan]

This is probably the worst possible weekend this summer for my laptop to break, and so naturally, It's broken.

[Tim Guan @thetimguan]

Why is it that AC Transit runs on time when I want to go to Safeway, but never when I want to go to work?

[Tim Guan @thetimguan]

"Can you raise the board?"
"Can you also raise the roof?"
#ochem #ohchem

[Tim Guan @thetimguan]

Time travels slowest when you have food in the microwave.

[Tim Guan @thetimguan]

What major should I declare if I just want to read, eat, and watch Netflix?