Frozerman

The unofficial twitter page of nothing that matters to anyone but maybe my dog, Nora.

[Frozerman @theuglymuppet]

Ah winter... Where your jacket is long enough that when you fart it will go right up your nose for personal enjoyment. #lactoseintolerant #thejoyofdairy

[Frozerman @theuglymuppet]

Me, I heard a rumour you walked in on a porno.
Co-worker, OMG no, never! That's not true.
Me, oh sorry. Someone told a story about you walking at a hotel....
Co-worker, oh that story. Ya it's true.

HOW DO YOU FORGET THAT? It would be my most prized conversation starter.

[Frozerman @theuglymuppet]

Potatoes are vegetables.
Limes are fruit.
Tonic is water.
I'm killing the health craze trend.

[Frozerman @theuglymuppet]

What are you doing?
Eating chicken fingers....
It's kinda of late to be eating don't you think?
No.
I don't think you need to have another beverage?
Yes, gotta wash down those chicken fingers.
#chickenfingers #saltysnacks #shitupkrista

[CBC Manitoba @CBCManitoba]

Popeye's favourite food is . . . chicken? Manitoba woman's Family Feud answer goes viral https://t.co/RaEMume0Yg

[Aciu European Travel @aciutravel]

Did you know you could get up to €600 compensation for a disrupted flight within the last 3 years? 5 BILLION Euros are left unclaimed each year. #airtravel #Europe #traveltips  #flightdelayed #flightdelay #flightcanceled https://t.co/odIAuDReyg via @aciutravel

[Frozerman @theuglymuppet]

Woot woot! Way to go Canada! So proud. Sing that national anthem proud.
#gocanadago #WorldJuniors #nevergiveup #goldlooksgoodonyou #canadiansbeersnake

[Frozerman @theuglymuppet]

Pretty sure that's enough wine...
Pretty sure there is a line to tell me when it's enough wine and it's not. But thanks for your concern... Sheila. #TGIF #thechipsarehidden #theresmorewine

[Frozerman @theuglymuppet]

Hockey are porn are both the same. As soon as the action starts the music stops. #gomoosego #goodmusicplayingtonight #nopancakes

[Frozerman @theuglymuppet]

When I'm drinking wine in the shower, I wish it was beer. When I'm drinking beer in the shower, I wish I had another beer. Then I fart and wish I wasn't lactose intolerant. #showerbeer #lactoseintolerant #showerthoughts

[Frozerman @theuglymuppet]

This season, parents should take credit for gaming systems, tablets or computers. Let Santa have board games & other small toys. Bonus, parents at your kids school won't think you're a jerk. #thinkofothers #keepsantasimple #spiritofchristmas #christmasisforfamilies

[Frozerman @theuglymuppet]

Kids having fun making music and learning at the same time. Their inspiration was @okgo. #timingiseverything #cbcmusicclass #learningfun #musicislife #teachersareamazing #workingtogether https://t.co/8mleWpsbni

[Frozerman @theuglymuppet]

Talking in German so I can sit and just drink beer. Not in silence but silent. #ichvesteheniche

[Frozerman @theuglymuppet]

@PtheT Oh I am. #erdingeriloveyou

[Frozerman @theuglymuppet]

Dinner with my in-laws. #tweetingmydinner #oldpeopleconversations #patienceisavirtue #Ratherbedrinkingbeer

[Frozerman @theuglymuppet]

MIL - a lady I know drives in everyday from St. Pierre-Jolys to volunteer.
Husband - okay
MIL - she makes soup
#rivetingconversation

[Frozerman @theuglymuppet]

MIL - is this deacons corner?
Me - no
MIL - where are we?
Me - corner of bishop grading and lagimodiere
MIL - what's so special about this corner?
Me - nothing.
#10minutesinonly #afewmorehourstogo

[Frozerman @theuglymuppet]

I didn't realize thre were so many options. #paris #vacationinparis #summervacation #arrondissement #Europeanvacation https://t.co/j0efEhKzfO

[Frozerman @theuglymuppet]

Oh wow! So much fun! #ireland #castle #vacation #yesplease #planningsummervacation https://t.co/gzufKTzI9t