The Water Professor

This is a satirical feed. Not real. Fake news. Sad!

[The Water Professor @thewaterprof]

Even though I hate these Communist Nats you’ve got to admire the chutzpah of this move

[The Hon Keith Pitt @keithjpitt]

Welcoming @troygrant to the important role of Interim Inspector-General of Water Compliance. He’ll replace Mick Keelty who’s done some crucial work in the position as our Government puts communities back at the heart of the Murray-Darling Basin Plan #auspol

[The Water Professor @thewaterprof]

SRI congratulates Bidgee irrigators getting a bonus 6% allocation between scheduled announcements

[The Water Professor @thewaterprof]

UPDATE: The fantastic SRI leadership team have been out of the public spotlight recently, as they've been beavering away on the class action, getting the Bring The Bastard Home Party up and running, and farming.

More to come.

[The Water Professor @thewaterprof]

@danhayeslabor @KristyMcBain

[The Water Professor @thewaterprof]

The Professor was backing at odds on the 'We Got a Drink Party' so what a result!

Let's bring the bastard home with plenty more rain on our 2020 winter crops!

[The Water Professor @thewaterprof]

Let the campaigning begin! Brooksy and I are taking on the Coalition in 2022 and are going to win. You can take it to the bank.

Can't farking decide on a party name though so need all you free water lovin' comrades to help. We've narrowed it to four - vote now!

[The Water Professor @thewaterprof]

Let the campaigning begin! Brooksy and I are taking on the Coalition in 2022 and are going to win. You can take it to the bank.

Can't farking decide on a party name though so need all you free water lovin' comrades to help. We've narrowed it to four - vote now!

[The Water Professor @thewaterprof]

BREAKING NEWS: Poor Brooksy has been under a bit of pressure from the SRI failures of late, so man of the people Alan Jones has given up his wireless gig to take over as SRI chair.

It's only costing us $3 million a year - less than a failed class action!

[The Water Professor @thewaterprof]

John Barilaro is having a spat with everyone! But he's still getting our bonus water allocation so it's all good. Just the sort of feisty operator we need!

[The Water Professor @thewaterprof]

The Professor categorically denies rumours that the SRI leadership team are under pressure after failing to deliver the water allocation they promised at the Can the Plan rally.

We are all united behind the current team and you can take that to the bank!

[The Water Professor @thewaterprof]

Sussan Ley and Perin Davey were contacted by the Pastoral Times and were predictably too pissweak to comment.

More to come.

[The Water Professor @thewaterprof]

It's on baby! My exclusive report on SRI's latest water strategy will be in tomorrow's Deni PT. Here's a sneak peek in the thread below...

[The Water Professor @thewaterprof]

Sources close to the PT have called this SRI’s best political strategy yet.

“We’re nailing it. This option is even better than tipping into John Madigan and Sarah Hanson-Young. And better than punting the courts or the National Water Initiative, which are expensive and hard.”

[The Water Professor @thewaterprof]

Huzzah! We've done it. Cheap water for everyone who wants to grow 10ha plots of government mandated animal feed crops next winter!

Much better than just using the 100 GL to underpin an immediate allocation - and anyone who says otherwise is a communist.

[The Water Professor @thewaterprof]

Farking communists in the NSW Water Commission are saying that rain falling on the vineyard will be debited against allocation. Mmmkaaay...