Jade

i am just 100 bats in a pair of go go boots

[Jade @thighhighcrocs_]

@pitbull who is dale

[Jade @thighhighcrocs_]

Bad Company by Bad Company off the album Bad Company

[Katy Sheward @katyNOTperry]

31 is absolutely losing your mind to the dance remix of How to Save a Life at your local bar.

[Jade @thighhighcrocs_]

I want Tinder looks but Hinge personality is that too much to ask for

[Jade @thighhighcrocs_]

I’m sorry I can’t be her..

[Jade @thighhighcrocs_]

Who invents lingo?? Like who saw a hot person in 1965 and was like “wow they’re groovy” or who recently was like, listening to their friend tell a lie and then was like “THAT’S CAP”? The new word for confusing will now be FLEEBY. Use it in a sentence? “That’s fleeby”.

[Jade @thighhighcrocs_]

The 60’s were wild. Your doctor would walk into the room smoking a cigarette and tell you you’re fatigued because you’re probably not eating enough tuna jello casserole.

[Jade @thighhighcrocs_]

Advice to companies that sell emergency contraceptives: this is NOT the time to raise your prices based on high demand. You will be more crucial than ever very soon, and people will be depending on you. Do the right thing.

[Jade @thighhighcrocs_]

why did I do this

[Jade @thighhighcrocs_]

All men do is eat cardboard and lie

[Jade @thighhighcrocs_]

Phallic Baldwin

[Jade @thighhighcrocs_]

Couples in Bushwick be like “this is our daughter Ketamina Carmelos”

[Jade @thighhighcrocs_]

It’s Wayne’s World and I’m just living in it

[Jade @thighhighcrocs_]

eating macaroni salad in the dark while listening to taking back sunday is a low place to be in and there’s nothing like home, baby.

[Jade @thighhighcrocs_]

John C Reilly sounds like an egg