Not Crista

life is tough, my darling, but so are you.

[Ghostly Presence @CreepePaper]

No thank you, Spotify. I've moved on from my manic episode.

[Not Crista @thisisntcrista]

My husband said to me today and said “I didn’t know Chappell Roan was a gay icon”
Sir. I’ve been listening to her for months and you just now realize this?

[Not Crista @thisisntcrista]

@BeccaNikol He is so perfect 💙

[Not Crista @thisisntcrista]

@MrBeast Bruh- I spent more days with random strangers in worse conditions while in the military. This is easy.

[Wheat Thins @WheatThins]

mojo dojo casa house

[Not Crista @thisisntcrista]

I gave my child one of those bra inserts and told her it was a hat. Now she’s walking around proudly displaying her new hat.

[Not Crista @thisisntcrista]

Someone please tell me I’m not the only one who taught my dog a weird command phrase.
For instance- when I want her to move to another spot on the bed I say “scuba scoot”

[Kaylan_TX @Kaylan_TX_]

Pride month is almost here!!#HappyPride🏳️‍🌈

[Not Crista @thisisntcrista]

@CreepePaper @aslantheliones @fishmalt @Basko1422 She’s a basic girlie

[Not Crista @thisisntcrista]

@BeccaNikol STOP. NO. I’m so sorry!

[Not Crista @thisisntcrista]

We go from no sound to aggressive background guitar. Okay. #TheBachelor

[Not Crista @thisisntcrista]

Was no audio the surprise that Jesse kept talking about? #TheBachelor

[Not Crista @thisisntcrista]

Being a mom is magical.

[Not Crista @thisisntcrista]

@catroverted @aleesgaming @cococremie Alternating Tylenol and Motrin for those extra hard days. Mine doesn’t like binkies, so we give her lots of crunchy snacks to help her. Other than that..it’s lots of crying.

[Not Crista @thisisntcrista]

@aslantheliones Feed the algorithm

[Not Crista @thisisntcrista]

Adam: so did you really watch Lord of the Dance a lot as a kid?
Me:

[Not Crista @thisisntcrista]

@CreepePaper

[Not Crista @thisisntcrista]

@catroverted Agreeeeed. She’s the best thing that’s ever been in my life. 💖

[Not Crista @thisisntcrista]

I finally lost all of my pregnancy weight, though I’m more proud that I’ve kept a human alive and happy all of this time more.

[Not Crista @thisisntcrista]

@aslantheliones