Kristin Wood

I peaked when Albertsons retweeted me

[jonny sun @jonnysun]

me when the restaurant brings out bread for the table

[Brady @pebbut]

british people can finally stop faking their accent and talk normally

[emilio @emilio__oilime]

your wife is in labor and you're rushing her to the hospital. you get in a cab and it turns out to be the cash cab. do you play or not

[Taylor Kay Phillips @TayKayPhillips]

I like to say thank you to my server when he arrives with the water, then again while he’s pouring the water, then another time when he hands me the glass full of water, and then one final time when he’s walking away

[Spencer Althouse @SpencerAlthouse]

“No worries either way!” —me worrying both ways

[Eso @coolurbanhippie]

I don’t know who needs to hear this but rest is not a reward. You don’t have to earn rest. You need rest. You deserve rest. You are worthy of rest simply because you are a living being. And don’t ever feel guilty for taking time to rest.

[between tufans @tufannadjafi]

timothée chalamet sounds like the name of a very wealthy mouse

[Jackson Bird @jackisnotabird]

I feel this.

[brooke @BlokyzzOriginal]

Hey sorry I’m not answering your texts I’m completely booked for the day

[trash jones @jzux]

airdropping this to everyone in the courtroom

[April Clark @autogynefiles]

I wish Mario Kart had an option to just walk around instead of being in a car... Wanna get out of my car and smell the flowers... Pet the cows... Wanna feel my feet on the ground

[Kristin Wood @thisisntkris10]

@Marinabeannn RIGHT WOW

[Kristin Wood @thisisntkris10]

I would sell a vital organ to have one of these again