WOODY X NUTDAN
#nnutdanXWoodyTalk#nnutdan
«about the day nut received the news of his father's passing, while he was still abroad»
💬 : when you were performing abroad and that happened… tell me about how you had to deal with those feelings? having to perform, go on tour and then come back to take care of the person you love the most.
nut : honestly, at that time, i felt like... i just blanked out. it was confusing because that day, work was done we were about to fly back, and i woke up in the morning and see a line message popping up saying "the funeral is today." i was like "really?" my mind just went completely blank i don't know how to behave or what to do. the whole room was dead silent i was alone in my bedroom and everything went completely silent it was a feeling... honestly, i had never lost anyone before. my grandparents from father side both are still alive i never met my other grandparents because they passed away before i was born. so my dad was the first person i've ever lost i think i felt like i saw my mom being sadder than me so i felt that i might have to... not be as sad, in order to keep my mom okay i felt like i needed to be the one to take care of my mom next from my dad, i had to be strong. to be honest, my dad had been sick for a long time, and his condition gradually worsened during my tours, i didn't see him much but he was at home. my mom and my older brother took care of him around that time i flew to america, had a week off, and then flew to europe. that trip to europe was the final period when my dad started fading, that day was the day i felt... confused about my own life. like... is this really happening? everything was just confusing because i had never faced this before but ultimately... there was too much going on for me to sit and dwell on the sadness. i'm not someone who likes to dwell on sad thoughts or get addicted to sadness like some people looking at old photos to immerse myself in it. i felt that i had to keep living and fulfill my duties. i don't know if i repressed it or not, but i try not to look back on it too much.
🥺