Tim's Paper Trail

an ever-widening gyre of thoughts, images, and other media. i tweet when it feels right.

[Tim's Paper Trail @timspapertrail]

PSA: If you bought a carton of milk on the day #Scaramucci was hired, it's still fresh. #ScrewedTheMooch @POTUS

[Tim's Paper Trail @timspapertrail]

Do you go to school for that?

[Tim's Paper Trail @timspapertrail]

Her job consists of taking pictures of sunrises.

[Tim's Paper Trail @timspapertrail]

Just watched an #Aleve commercial about a woman who has back pain that prevents her from getting out of bed in the morning to do her job.

[Tim's Paper Trail @timspapertrail]

@Msldemarco hey mac, could I enlist your services in publicizing my search for a roommate in the NYC area? #LetMyTimmyStay #thx

[Tim's Paper Trail @timspapertrail]

@realDonaldTrump Many are saying you aren't smart enough to orchestrate Russian meddling in the election, so you must be innocent. Thoughts?

[Tim's Paper Trail @timspapertrail]

@MattHammer12 I almost forgot to wish you a happy birthday. Have mercy on my soul, weather god, for I am a mere mortal.

[Tim's Paper Trail @timspapertrail]

Remember these words when @POTUS tries to condemn Kim Jong Un's brutal regime. #NorthKorea #OttoWarmbier @CNN @LastWeekTonight

[Tim's Paper Trail @timspapertrail]

@VerneTroyer thoughts? @netflix https://t.co/75vvMieAQW

[Tim's Paper Trail @timspapertrail]

when is the @netflix Austin Powers series making its debut? #yeahbaby #makeithappen @MikeJohnMyers

[Tim's Paper Trail @timspapertrail]

when is the @netflix Austin Powers series making its debut? #yeahbaby #makeithappen @MikeJohnMyers

[Tim's Paper Trail @timspapertrail]

@Msldemarco @Msldemarco pls help me make something of this liberal arts degree.

[Tim's Paper Trail @timspapertrail]

@Msldemarco heard you're looking for a dank meme assistant. i'm looking for a new job. #chamberofmemeflection #benberdanke

[Tim's Paper Trail @timspapertrail]

reading #barb fan fiction, @Stranger_Things. man, the internet is a great place.

[🦁 @anniemlyons]

take time out of your day to listen to @LouisTheChild you won't regret it

[Tim's Paper Trail @timspapertrail]

My reaction to the @realDonaldTrump presser today: #wtf #DonaldTrump #TrumpPressConference #postyerGIFs @CNN

[Sam Spero @SRSpero]

I fully expect to wake up tomorrow and watch Steve Bannon driving Donald Trump down the freeway in white Ford Bronco. #Trump #TrumpLeaks

[Tim's Paper Trail @timspapertrail]

@realDonaldTrump It's OK! @Nordstrom still sells tissue boxes for you and @IvankaTrump #MAGA #DonaldTrump #ActPresidential

[Tim's Paper Trail @timspapertrail]

The only way 2016 could get any worse would be if Dick Clark came back to life and died again on #NYE. @nbcsnl

[Tim's Paper Trail @timspapertrail]

@Msldemarco long shot, but you never know what's out there. #letmybabystay has been one of my go-tos for fightin' the blues.