🦋 Tira

Behind the account is a real person, let's be kind

[🦋 Tira @tiragux]

I have no business lurking under the hurt no comfort tag on AO3, like none whatsoever

[🦋 Tira @tiragux]

Pernah ada masanya ngulet itu menyenangkan sekali, sebuah kebahagiaan kecil. Sekarang mau ngulet rasanya takut otot ketarik, bisa berhari hari sakitnya 🥲

[🦋 Tira @tiragux]

So I've been getting more book related content lately. Which is great, really, it probably means I'm successfully restarting old interests again. But hoo boy I'm being reminded again how very expensive books are, really heartbreaking.

[🦋 Tira @tiragux]

Yes, mother, I too wish I'm gone from this world and stop disrupting your life.

[🦋 Tira @tiragux]

What a roller coaster ride of life of a hopeless romantic girl who decided to spend the rest of her life alone because being in a relationship scares her shitless.

[🦋 Tira @tiragux]

Useless

[🦋 Tira @tiragux]

I'm utterly damaged because of the two of you, and I hope I will never forget that so I don't recklessly bring a kid of my own into this world and repeat the cycle.

[🦋 Tira @tiragux]

Being reminded again and again that you have no intention to be a better parent, it's always 'take what I gave you and don't ask for more or I will give you silent treatment'.

[🦋 Tira @tiragux]

-- Reading require full attention of my whole being. My reading at least. I'd like to think that it's fine, but I still have daily responsibilities to finish. So. Ugh. Sometimes I can't help feeling guilty for spending too much time reading.

[🦋 Tira @tiragux]

Easing myself into reading more often again, I realized for me personally reading is so time consuming. Unlike watching things where I can multitask, reading requires most limbs and senses for me; need my eyes obv, need hands to hold the things I'm reading. --

[🦋 Tira @tiragux]

Well hello so since this tweet I finished 4 books (including the one I tweeted about) that are similar in lightness and page numbers I guess. Plus at least a dozen fanfictions. Basically I read a lot more in the span of one month than I did the last couple of years.

[🦋 Tira @tiragux]

-- which means I can't do anything else that requires my hand and eyes. I don't enjoy reading by listening to audiobooks so I don't do that. When watching shows I could busy my hand with something else, I can even only listen to the dialogue while directing my eyes elsewhere. --

[🦋 Tira @tiragux]

@KAI121 halo, boleh tolong cek dmnya ya terima kasih

[🦋 Tira @tiragux]

So, yeah. Yay me?

[🦋 Tira @tiragux]

Well hello so since this tweet I finished 4 books (including the one I tweeted about) that are similar in lightness and page numbers I guess. Plus at least a dozen fanfictions. Basically I read a lot more in the span of one month than I did the last couple of years.

[🦋 Tira @tiragux]

Uhhh so I kinda finally finished a whole book (a relatively light fiction novel but still a book, right) for the first time in who knows how many years. And I just feel like this is a moment worth commemorating.

[🦋 Tira @tiragux]

I'd say that it's a good start to a hopefully more diverse type of reads in the future, but I'd be happy if I can maintain the current habit at least a couple more months.

[🦋 Tira @tiragux]

I take care of your feelings so much more than anyone else but I'm taking stray no matter what the reason for your foul mood.

[🦋 Tira @tiragux]

I don't understand how you don't understand that your abrupt mood swings are harmful, not just inconvenient. And the one who takes the most damage in this house is me, not sis who never fully understand nuance or dad who is just too desensitized to other people's feeling

[🦋 Tira @tiragux]

And yay again for finishing another book (from the same series, not adapted to movie yet) not even 24 hours later! 2 books in 3 days. Maybe I will get my old boookworm trait back? 🥹

[🦋 Tira @tiragux]

Uhhh so I kinda finally finished a whole book (a relatively light fiction novel but still a book, right) for the first time in who knows how many years. And I just feel like this is a moment worth commemorating.

[🦋 Tira @tiragux]

Anyway it's something nice for me so I just want to 'journal' it somewhere 😊