Love archery hunting it’s my passion, a general love for the outdoors. Father of 2 amazing young adults, Papa of 2. One amazing beautiful GF that keeps me sane.
For The Northerners Who Want To Move To The South:
Down in the South, If you run your car into a ditch, don't panic. Four men in a four-wheel drive pickup truck with a tow chain will be along shortly. Don't try to help them, just stay out of their way. This is what they live for.
Remember, "y'all" is singular, "all y'all" is plural, and “all y'all's" is plural possessive.
Get used to hearing "You ain't from ‘round here, are ya?"
Save all manner of bacon grease. You will be instructed later on how to use it.
Don't be worried at not understanding what people are saying, they can't understand you either.
The first Southern statement to creep into a transplanted Northerner's vocabulary, is the adjective "big ‘ol," truck or “big ‘ol" boy. Most Northerners begin their Southern-influenced dialect this way. Ev’ry single one of them are in denial about it, too.
The proper pronunciation you learned in school is no longer proper. Just forget it all. Throw it out the window, now, right now.
Be advised that the phrase, "He needed killin" is an absolute valid defense here. Don’t ask questions, for your own safety. Trust me.
If you hear a Southerner exclaim, "Hey, y'all, watch this!" you should stay out of the way. These are likely to be the last words he'll ever say. It will always be a man or a group of men. Again, trust me.
If there is the prediction of even the slightest chance, of even the smallest accumulation of snow, your presence is required at the local grocery store. It doesn't matter whether you need anything or not. Don’t ask questions, you just have to go there.
“weather days” also applies to ice storms and floods, No one will slip and slide on the icy roads or tunnel through flooded streets more than your average “weather day” redneck in a souped up pickup. Trust me when I say, there WILL likely be an additional redneck yelling, “y’all watch this,” as he trails said pickup, hanging on for dear life, on some truck pulled flotation device. Stay off the roads at all costs during these weather days. Again, just trust me.
If you encounter a man named Bubba, you WANT to be his friend. Trust me on this one.
AND REMEMBER:
Do not be surprised to find that 10-year-olds own their own shotguns; they are proficient marksmen, and their mammas taught them how to aim.
#NurseHumor