Tom Simpson

Personal twitter account. Mostly just nerdy or silly retweets. All views are personal/unaffiliated. RTs ≠ endorsements. My pharmacy account is @SHPAPresident

[whirling, screaming head @slime_golem]

The guy on the left recalls discovering his sweetheart was cheating during a parachuting trip. He’s content to die, haunted by this memory.

The guy on the right is sad about dying, unable to spend more time on the computer.

[Marshall Julius @MarshallJulius]

Gary Oldman giggling at farts dubbed into his movies, then laughing 'til the tears roll down his cheeks, may well be the happiest minute of your day.

[Holodeck Four @holodeckfour]

Warp 9.

[Posts Of Cats @PostsOfCats]

why cats are like this 😭

[Joseph Bottum @JosephBottum]

Of all the student papers I've ever received, my favorite is the one that began: "As Karl Marx wrote in his famous book, Selected Writings of Karl Marx, . . . "
It's the little touches that make teaching worthwhile.

[James Hogg @JamesAHogg2]

Ever wondered how Electric Six would go down in a Victorian drawing room?

This is bordering on genius, in my humble opinion.

Good day to you.

[frankincense zeppo @NoahPasternak]

Was in the audience for The Muppet Show and these two people in the balcony showed absolutely zero decorum. I tried to tell them that their ironic detachment is hurting how they engage with art, but they told me I should engage with a better deodorant. Then I cried

[Tom Simpson @tomsssimpson]

@fesshole It is just so good. My two kids at age 10 and 12 both agreed it was better than Star Wars.

[Fesshole🧻 @fesshole]

Played an episode of Blake's 7 to check streaming from my home RAID was working properly. Realised the stories and acting were better than anything new from streaming in the last decade. Daughter agrees. Cancelled all five video streaming subscriptions.

[Oonagh @Okeating]

That time the Archbishop of Liverpool got on the wrong side of Jabba the Hutt.