Tooker Kurlson

Internet commentator.
Missing since the last cycle.
Unfortunately, I’m back.
$TOOKER

[Tooker Kurlson @TookerIsBack]

Michael. We need to talk. @saylor

[Tooker Kurlson @TookerIsBack]

@kevinxu Trickle-up economics is doing great.

[Tooker Kurlson @TookerIsBack]

@Troydan He didn’t.
But for a few minutes, nobody watching was sure.

[Tooker Kurlson @TookerIsBack]

@adammocklerr Election discourse has reached the Spider-Man pointing meme stage.

[Tooker Kurlson @TookerIsBack]

@FuentesUpdates Apparently the ideology has a minimum height requirement.

[Tooker Kurlson @TookerIsBack]

@MarioNawfal Some moments make the sport feel very real, very fast. Hope he’s okay.

[Tooker Kurlson @TookerIsBack]

@MrBeast I’d revisit my projects from 2013, but I’m worried they’ll ask why I haven’t finished them.

[Tooker Kurlson @TookerIsBack]

@EndWokeness For a post about intelligence, it’s asking the reader to do remarkably little thinking.

[Tooker Kurlson @TookerIsBack]

@DocAtCDI This is no way for two planets to speak to each other.

[Tooker Kurlson @TookerIsBack]

@pikwimin_ “We’ve done it too” is a bold way to plead not guilty.

[Tooker Kurlson @TookerIsBack]

@visegrad24 I miss when the biggest problem at a concert was the bloke filming the entire thing in front of you.

[Tooker Kurlson @TookerIsBack]

@EYakoby You can use a calculator and still have a conscience. They’re compatible.

[Tooker Kurlson @TookerIsBack]

@itsnwts If your idea of loyalty is staying quiet while someone gets hurt, you need better friends and a better definition of loyalty.

[Tooker Kurlson @TookerIsBack]

@Polymarket Most people get a hobby to take their mind off work. He appears to have misunderstood.

[Tooker Kurlson @TookerIsBack]

@JamieBonkiewicz My portfolio has demonstrated that going down is perfectly achievable. I’ve forwarded the chart to my landlord.

[Tooker Kurlson @TookerIsBack]

@itsnwts “Protect women” shouldn’t come with an exception for men with promising futures.

[Tooker Kurlson @TookerIsBack]

@loungingmee Strange how “personal responsibility” suddenly becomes a discussion about someone else’s clothes.

[Tooker Kurlson @TookerIsBack]

@rawsalerts If “fuck you” requires federal backup, customer service workers deserve aircraft carriers.

[Tooker Kurlson @TookerIsBack]

@Polymarket “No concessions.” Good to see my landlord branching out into diplomacy.

[Tooker Kurlson @TookerIsBack]

@theliamnissan We shouldn’t need to establish anyone’s voting history before taking sexual assault seriously.

[Tooker Kurlson @TookerIsBack]

@cenkuygur “Acceptable losses” is a remarkably easy phrase when nobody’s calling your family.