tori smith

[Joshwelt @weltszzn]

I’m missing the 2010s frozen yogurt boom like a b!tch right now

[Marie🧚 @glitchu__]

How it feels to type in ur email and password with a remote

[Zion @zionszzn]

i’m sorry but the scholastic book fair did not inspire a love of reading it created my love of shopping fr

[m @pumptinis]

sorry boss can’t work today need to be fully prepared to watch the funerals of amanda batula and west wilson

[Zion @zionszzn]

The person who came up with lefty loosey righty tighty absolutely cranked it out of the park on that one

[EMILY SUNDBERG @Emily_Sundberg]

When you put your legs up in the AMC recliners, that’s lymphatic drainage

[Covie @covie_93]

Losing in a GOP primary because you want to prosecute pedophiles is crazy to me

[Covie @covie_93]

The fact that Thomas Massie is fighting for his political life in a Republican primary because he wants pedophiles to face justice is not a good look for the Republican party.

[Betches @betchesluvthis]

trying not to complain about the heat when I spent the last 6 months complaining about the cold

[Chris @iamchriscorooo]

I wonder what three birria tacos w cilantro, onion & a margarita doing rn

[swinky @swinkying]

junie b. jones tried to sell me crack cocaine at applebees

[throwbacks @solelynostalgia]

he raised a generation of insomniacs

[deaf kennedys @thamosdeaf]

That’s why I fucked your bitch you fat motherfucker

[Cardi B @iamcardib]

Sometimes I forget I’m a celebrity… damn y’all ain’t never cuss your babydad out when you hungry?

[☔ @Whotfismick]

Me sensing an opportunity to randomly sing a song mid conversation based off words you said

[sarah @heavenbrat]

idk girl sometimes you need to crash out and be a bitch so you dont get an auto immune disease

[miia @miiagarro]

not arguing with a man with a fat ass, whatever you say cake boss.

[cj- @cjnieI]

One thing about butterflies they do not fly in your house that’s a bug with class

[Harry Sisson @harryjsisson]

SNL just made fun of Pete Hegseth, Brett Kavanaugh, and Kash Patel all at once and it is hilarious. MAGA is going to hate it

[Jenn🌲 @JuniperFolly]

this is what it feels like to live in chicago