emmy

[emmy @totally_emazing]

Me:*writes one sentence*

Me:*checks to see if I hit my word count*

[Michael O'Connor @oconnor_reports]

Virginia

[dannica @dannarebb]

a reminder to live like Dolly Parton: be kind to people, and showcase your large breasts. ❤️

[Eric Levitz @EricLevitz]

I’ve been a Knicks fan for 14 long days, so tonight was very special for me personally

[matt @mattybtweets69]

The news/society: stop eating Trader Joe’s frozen meals. There is glass in them and they are harmful to your health

Me: I’m da glass man

[claire @rosiekennedyxx]

what’s Mamdani’s plan for my birthday

[Xay @hoodopulence]

I am once again complaining about the Amtrak tickets from NY to DC should be nowhere near $100+ for one way

[M.E 🍃 @Emmys]

What just happened to me, mosquitologically, can never happen again

[Robert Jimison @RobertJimison]

the asylum where they raised me

[𝐄𝐟𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐌𝐚𝐫𝐤𝐞𝐭 𝐇𝐲𝐩𝐞 @EffMktHype]

"Collateralized Burrito Obligations"

[emmy @totally_emazing]

@GeorgeTakei @KellieMeyerNews !!

[Organizermemes @OrganizerMemes]

Breaking: the Supreme Court ruled today in A 8-1 decision that you’re mid and have bad vibes. Alito dissenteded.

[emmy @totally_emazing]

O’Leary, O’Reilly, McDonough, McHenry
There’s no you as Irish as Ayo Edebri

[Overheard District @OverheardWDC]

At Eastern Market median crosswalk:

“Wow, the Capitol building is just DC’s eye of Sauron.”

[emmy @totally_emazing]

Free Willy

[clementine @ilyclemmie]

how did bro get this much air

[Maddy Mussen @maddy_mussen]

I am writing to you under the Freedom of Information Act 2000 to ask if u are mad at me

[emmy @totally_emazing]

@exdeelolol No you don’t lmao

[emmy @totally_emazing]

@exdeelolol Where are you goinggg

[emmy @totally_emazing]

@exdeelolol I believe